The long and the short of it

My older sister, the lawyer, used to have the habit of starting almost every comment with the words "the long and the short of it". Even though she and I had a lot of differences while growing up (me being perfect and all), she is by far and away my favorite sibling. Still, after a while I wanted to throttle her when "the long and the short of it" came out of her mouth…… (Sorry, sis.) By the way, she's moved on from that phrase!  But here's a real long/short story from Israel. A "doctor" has been convicted of running a clinic that promised clients to increase their height. Or increase the length of their penis. The clinic promised a gain of up to 3.9 inches in height or 2.4 inches of length in the organ in question. The method for increasing height included suspending the patient in the air by their arms and legs and/or stretching them with weights. I shudder to think what the penis enlargement routine entailed. But, since they promised only 3.9 inches in height and 2.4 inches in length, one assumes the treatment was - er - extreme……… (Note: Any guys out there who felt their skin crawl; that is a normal reaction. Any woman who was rolling on the floor laughing; that was cruel).