NASCAR, NBC And Muslims
A whole bunch of bloggers have been posting about NBC, the networks attempt to recruit "Muslim looking men" and the networks apparent attempt to set up NASCAR for an "expose'".
To recap, a memo was obtained that showed NBC was actively trying to recruit men of Muslim appearance to show up at NASCAR races to try to provoke an anti-Muslim response which would be broadcast on Dateline NBC - those wonderful, integrity-based people who brought you exploding pickup trucks. That they attached rockets to to make explode. Yeah, them.
Well, there are two things to consider here. Reports here say that NBC has already tried this at at least one race - but they got no response. So maybe, just maybe they leaked this memo to try to provoke a response. Or they really are as outright fricking stupid as they sound.
Well, Blue Crab Boulevard, always at the forefront of High Journalistic Standards™ has come up with a modest proposal of our own. To wit:
Date: Wed, 05 Apr 2006 13:05:54 -0800 (PST)
From: Subject: Looking for redneck Males to participate in Blue Crab Boulevard broadcast Segment
[Forwarded]
Hey, Y'all,
I hope everyone is doing well.
I have been talking with a producer of the up and coming major force in broadcasting today, Blue Crab Boulevard and they are in the process of filming a piece on anti-redneck and anti-NASCAR discrimination at the NBC network. They are looking for some redneck male candidates for their show who would be willing to go to non-redneck gatherings and see if they attract any discriminatory comments or actions while being filmed by Blue Crab Boulevard.
They recently taped two ball cap wearing men decked out in American flag T-shirts visiting a Starbucks in Oakland to see how people would treat them. They set them up with hidden microphones and cameras, etc. (They were beaten with biscotti, by the way).
They want to do the same thing 2 or 3 other times (in various parts of the USA) with one or two redneck men in each setting. They are looking for men who actually "look redneck". They want a guy with no Southern accent whatsoever, a good thick beard, an outgoing personality, and someone willing to wear a Dale Earnhardt, Jr. T-shirt during the filming.
They also want someone who is fairly well accomplished and has contributed to American society at large in some meaningful way. Like crushing a beer can on his head or shooting a possum.
That said, I'm urgently looking for someone who can be filmed this April 1st weekend at a Border's event celebrating their fearless commitment to free speech (and other smaller events) in Virginia. Blue Crab Boulevard is willing to fly in someone and cover their weekend expenses (Ed Note: at a Motel 6). The filming would take place all day on Saturday and Sunday.
We already have a Daisy Dukes wearing sister who will be filmed there but a redneck is also needed to join her. I also need candidates for the other filming segments which will take place in the following weeks.
A few weeks later, Blue Crab Boulevard will fly all the filmed participants to Daytona to interview them as a group about their experience and thoughts on discrimination they've faced at the NBC offices, especially in light of the times we live in (lying media, scumbag networks, etc.). The show, if approved by Blue Crab Boulevard (highly likely), is expected to air sometime this summer.
What I need from interested candidates is an email with an attached clear photograph, a resume, contact information and a sack full of cash. I also need basic information such as age, ethnic background, accomplishments, etc. (Bonus for owning a pickup with TWO shotguns in the rack).
The sooner I can get this the better and please don't make emails too long. I will then submit a group of candidates to Blue Crab Boulevard so they can choose the people for the show.
Please forward this to all redneck lists you can. Because of the upcoming filming in Virginia, this is pretty time-sensitive. My contact information is below.
Hey, Y'all, watch this,
Buford T. Justice
Because I Felt Like It, Media | Gaius Wednesday, 5 April , 2006
By Black Jack, Thursday, 6 April , 2006 @ 10:55 am
I was 14 years old before I learned that “damn” and “Yankee” were two different words. I was born in Dixie, drive a pick up truck, and own more than one shotgun. My sister never misses a NASCAR race, I eat squirrels, and know just what to do at a pig stickin’ and I could lay my hands on a jug of corn liquor in rather short order. Do you think I might qualify for a spot on the team?
By Gauis Arbo, Thursday, 6 April , 2006 @ 11:40 am
Sure enough sounds like it! Especially if it’s good corn liquor!