Now This Is Serious!

If you go to a park in Honolulu, you may not be able to go in the park. Someone has been stealing brass toilet valves from parks all over Honolulu. More than 100 have been stolen to date along with various other plumbing fixtures.

"It's very upsetting, in a sense, to have to deal with this — to have taxpayers to repair something like this that we could use for so much better purposes," said Les Chang, director of the city's Department of Parks and Recreation.

He said in addition to being expensive, the repairs will be an inconvenience to park users. There's also the hidden cost of other work not being done because crews will be busy repairing the toilets.

Police suspect the thieves are either selling the valves on the black market or even selling them for scrap. We here at Blue Crab Boulevard want to go on record as saying that this is a crappy way to make a buck.

We apologize. We tried to stop ourselves, but we just couldn't.