Blue Crab Boulevard

A Sale Of Two Cities

One city is the shining city on the hill. The place where life expectancy has increased dramatically. The streets paved with increased wages and lower crime rates. A city with a booming economy, rising tax revenues and low inflation and interest rates.

The other is the city the Democrats talk about.

Ladies and Gentlemen! Blue Crab Boulevard proudly presents A Sale Of Two Cities! (With profound apologies to the spirit of Charles Dickens)>

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. No, never mind. It was just the worst of times!

The evil, bad people laughed at the plight of the poor. They gathered in their feasting halls and plotted how to take food out of the mouths of the working people.

And their plots resulted in the children having no coats. Or shoes. Or Hummers. The evil bad people kept somehow making the economy thrive, but pay no attention to that. Because there are no coats! Honest!

The evil bad people don't really care about coatless kids, really they don't. because they want to keep us down, man.

See? They're making us cower and everything! Because the mean, evil bad people keep oppressing us and everything. They put all these restraints on us expressing ourselves. Really! I heard a whole bunch of actors say so on Oprah! Every day! Check your local listings!

See? See? Just look at that repression, man. I'm telling you, the evil bad, mean, evil people are really mean. And they are cruel to immigrants who just want to come here by the millions and just kind of take over the place.

See, look at that. And they want to build a fence! And secure the borders! Evil, bad, mean people. But never fear, the forces of truthiness and justice are on the way!

And they are bringing universal health care, too! Really! Honest! And a pony!

The End (of the world as we know it)

Because I Felt Like It, Foto Phun, Humor | Gaius Thursday, 25 May , 2006

By Jacques, Thursday, 25 May , 2006 @ 1:14 pm

Pretty damn good.
By Gaius, Thursday, 25 May , 2006 @ 1:17 pm

Hehe.
By Brainster, Thursday, 25 May , 2006 @ 4:19 pm

You’re very ‘umble!

Terrific post!
By Gaius, Thursday, 25 May , 2006 @ 4:37 pm

Yer ‘umble servant, sir!
By fletch, Thursday, 25 May , 2006 @ 7:41 pm

“Please, sir, I want some more.” :o)

Good stuff!

I’ve been ‘doing the Dickens’ lately– We read “Great Expectations” and “David Copperfield” in HS in 1980(geez-I’m getting old!), but I hadn’t really ever read any of his works as an adult until now…
By Gaius, Thursday, 25 May , 2006 @ 7:54 pm

I’m going to start working through the complete Mark Twain before I start looking back through the Dickens stuff. Some of it’s not so good, as I remember, but I did like Great Expectations quite a lot back when I read that one. David Copperfield was ok, not as good, I thought. I also played Scrooge in a production of A Christmas Carol a very, very long time ago. (I’m pretty sure it was type casting).

I wonder if they even teach any of those old books anymore these days.