It’s Unbearable

Foolish humans keep helping out the animal uprising. When will they realize the danger we are all in. A town in Northern Canada is expanding it's polar bear prison system so they can house even more wayward bears. The current cell block can house up to 23 bears. They will be adding an additional five cinder block cells.

The facility, built in 1980 in the world's polar bear capital, will also be cooled now over the summer to make the furry inmates' incarceration "a bit more bearable," said Shaun Bobier of the Manitoba Conservation Department.

Polar bears that wander into town in summer or autumn are now captured if they cannot be easily scared off. They are held in one of 23 cells divided by cinder block walls until ice forms on nearby Hudson's Bay and then released, Bobier said.

However, if the facility becomes overcrowded, some bears are relocated far away by helicopter.

With five new cells to be added soon, conservation officers will be able to hold more bears for longer periods, and then drive them out onto the ice floes when winter comes, Bobier said.

Last year, 58 bears were housed in the triple Quonset jail. In 2004, 170 bears were kept behind bars, fed only water and ice to ensure "they don't start coming to here for the food," Bobier said.

So now they'll have air-conditioning too! The pestilential prisoners of the polar penitentiary now get to hang out all summer in a nice cool place, lifting weights and learning more criminal skills daily. When will people see the way they are enabling these criminals! 

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2 Responses to It’s Unbearable

  1. Cliff Friedman says:

    Very funny post. However, my condolences to your son and his unit on the loss of Specialist Slaven. Please also extend to him my appreciation for his service. My wife and I visited Churchill, Manitoba a couple of years ago on a polar bear watching vacation. It was quite a fun. We saw the polar bear jail. At first, they would feed the bears while in jail. However, several years ago they stopped feeding them, just giving them water. The problem is that the bears come into town looking for food, since they are starving waiting for the ice to form so they can hunt and eat seals. They found that if they fed them, the bears were quite happy to be incarcerated. The effort is to discourage them from coming into town in the first place, as the only other solution is to shoot them, as they will kill and eat humans. I can only assume they also restrict their television.

  2. Gaius says:

    Thank you, Cliff. I will relay that.

    Maybe they should get that Sheriff from Arizona to show them how it’s done!