Pool Harbor

On Father's Day, I was the victim of a surprise attack by my family. First they lulled me into a false sense of security, then, when I wasn't looking, 'wham'.

The setup was my wife sending my youngest boy to ask me please, please, please can we go to a local Renaissance fair? Now, I've been to these things before, most notably at the really big one that's held up in Sterling, New York. In fact, I knew one of the guys who got that little clambake started in the first place. So between the pleading from the little guy, fond memories and frankly not having anything else to do, I agreed.

So the big day rolls around and we pile in the car and head over to the fair. It wasn't too crowded when we got there and we were able to get a parking place closer than the next county, always a plus at these sprawling events where you'll already be walking until you develop blisters or cramps. Or both.

If you've never been to one of these things, what they are is kind of a craft show in drag. There are more booths selling odd things than anything else. There are also several stages for various and sundry entertainments. The entertainers vary quite a lot in talent and ability, too. Some are quite good, some should definitely not quit their day jobs. Part of the entertainment is the way the vendors and actors dress up in various interpretations of Renaissance garb. Again, the outfits also vary quite a lot in authenticity and execution. Some are fabulous, others look like they were put together by out of work hippies. On a really bad day.

It was a pretty hot day, but at least there was a breeze, so we wandered around looking at various improbable outfits worn by people attending the fair. Even a lot of the civilians, so to speak, play dress up for the event. Some of these outfits cross over into complete bizarro land. Seeing a 300 pound plus guy in purple tights with a codpiece is enough to make you rethink that turkey leg you just ate.

We went into the "pub" (which was actually a tent) so my daughter could watch a band she had seen the previous day (she went with friends). They were actually quite good and did a kind of medieval Scottish themed show. The front man spoke in the requisite brogue and they really were all showmen. The act was quite funny and the front man got the audience involved. Afterward, while helping my daughter get the CD she bought signed by the band members, I found out the band was somewhat less than they appeared to be. Not only were they not Scots, they were all Americans from Texas. Still, they were quite good.

Eventually, my wife insisted I buy a sword I had admired in one booth, since it was Father's Day and all. The vendor turned out to be a local guy who makes swords as a hobby. They are quite real, not the decorative ones that you can find all over these days. His weapons are made out of real high carbon steel and are fully functional. In fact, he told me that a lot of his swords go to the folks who participate in tournaments run by the Society For Creative Anachronism.

After completing the mercantile equivalent of a marathon, we trudged wearily back to the car. The sheriff's deputies watching the entrance kept an eye on me as I walked past. Which I guess was fair considering I had several feet of steel blade over one shoulder. And I made sure I didn't make any sudden moves, either. They looked irritable. We drove home, tired but happy.

A little while after getting home, my wife had the kids give me a Father's Day card. It was more a booklet than a card and was quite humorous. Until I got to the last page, that is. That's when I saw, written just below the obligatory "we love you Dad" the dreaded words. "We bought a pool!"

They hate me, I just know it.

UPDATE: Pictures of Pool Harbor here.

Other Links to this Post

1. Blue Crab Boulevard » Blog Archive » Pool Harbor - Week One — July 16, 2006 @ 2:03 pm