While cleaning the birdcage, yet another fragment of a manuscript written by Dr. Watson fell out of the newspaper used to line the bottom of the cage. Are we lucky or what?
The Adventure of Leopold's Thumb
Of all the problems which have been submitted to my friend, Mr. Sherlock Holmes, for solution during the years of our intimacy, there were only two which I was the means of introducing to his notice — that of Leopold's thumb, and that of Colonel Warburton's lost luggage. Of these the latter may have afforded a finer opportunity for generating salable copy, but the other was so strange in its inception and so dramatic in its details that it may be the more worthy of being placed upon record, even if it does give me gas even to think about it. The story has,
I believe, been told more than once in the blogs, but, like all such narratives, its effect is much less striking when set forth en bloc in a single belch of pixels than when the facts slowly evolve before your own eyes. As each clue piles one upon the other, eventually you get bored and fall asleep, smacking your forehead sharply on the
keyboard. Which is how I got this raging headache and the reverse image of the letters 'QWERTY' embossed on my dome.
One morning, at a little before seven o'clock, I was awakened by the maid tapping at the door to announce that a man had come from Paddington and was waiting in the consulting-room. I dressed hurriedly, not even bothering to tie the laces on my shoes. After examining the man for only a moment, I ran to get Holmes.
"Come quickly," I exclaimed, "It is the worst case I have ever seen!"
As we enetered the examining room we beheld the sight of the man, Who I will call 'George', Sitting quietly with a jumble of words and letters heaped all around him on the floor.
"What's all this, then!" Holmes nearly shouted.
"I do not know what is afflicting me, sir. That is why I came to see the doctor." George answered, hesitantly. As he spoke his words became visible, floating gently in the air in front of him. Then the words began to change!
"I do not know who you think you are but I know people who can hunt you down like a dog and that is why I came to see the doctor." His words now read.
"I have never seen anything like this before, Holmes! What can it be, his words are visible!" I was shaking, I was so overwrought.
"Calm yourself, Watson. The words becoming visible happens all the time. You must not watch enough cartoons. It is the changing of the words that is of concern. This is easily the worst case of word-in-mouth-itis I have ever seen!"
"Can you help me, good sirs?" George pleaded. His words writhed and changed to,"I'm going to shoot your dog, then steal your woman".
"Elementary, my dear George. I know the proximate cause of the phenomenon you are being subjected to. I sense the presence of Leopold's Thumb!"
"Leopold's thumb?" I asked, "What is this affliction? I have never heard of it!"
"It is a condition caused by a sockpuppet rewriting your words and republishing them on a blog". Holmes answered. "There's only one way to cure it! We must get the TRUTHOUT!"
I shuddered in horror as I realized I could see Holmes' words! They shimmered and heaved and became something entirely different as I watched.
"I'll get you, my pretty, and your little dog, too."
I turned to flee……
Here endeth the fragment.