Toothpaste In Venezeula

Hugo Chavez, heir apparent to Fidel "Still Dead" Castro is working hard to be elected president-for-life of Venezuela. So hard, in fact, that he has his loyal minions promoting his candidacy on the floor of the soon to be unnecessary national assembly by distributing toothpaste. Yes, really, toothpaste.

His adversaries complained that government grocery stores are distributing a toothpaste called "10 Million Smiles" — produced by a local cooperative — which they call a veiled reference to Chavez's campaign slogan "10 Million Votes."

Chavez, who has promised a socialist revolution to end poverty in the world's No. 5 oil exporter, has promised to garner 10 million votes in the upcoming elections.

"That's not within the norms and it is absolutely prohibited," National Electoral Council Director Vicente Diaz told the local El Nacional newspaper in comments published on Sunday. "And we are going to open an investigation … of the supplier of that product."

The toothpaste flap started last week, when local media reported that legislator Berkis Solis had distributed the toothpaste on the floor of the National Assembly.

Diaz promised to investigate Solis as well as the government-subsidized supermarket chain, Mercal.

Due to the tireless efforts of our selfless photographers at the Magic 8-Ball Photography and Online Casino, we have obtained this Reuters Grade™ evidence of Chavez's message to Venezuelans!

Heartwarming democracy in action.