Feeling Down Since Your Abduction?

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Feeling depressed or distressed since you were released by the kidnappers? Is it hard to concentrate since they implanted the electrodes in your brain? Feel like there's nothing you can do about it since it's impossible to serve legal papers on aliens? The UFOs never stay in one place long enough to get a process server to them.

Never fear! You can sue the government! And there is a law firm specializing in just that.

BERLIN (Reuters) – A German lawyer hopes to drum up more business by pursuing state compensation claims for people who believe they were abducted by aliens.

"There's quite obviously demand for legal advice here," Jens Lorek told Reuters by telephone on Thursday. "The trouble is, people are afraid of making fools of themselves in court."

Lorek, a lawyer based in the eastern city of Dresden who specializes in social and labor law, said he hoped to expand his client base by taking on the unusual work.

He has yet to win any abduction claims, but says there are plenty of potential clients, noting that extra-terrestrial watchdogs report scores of alien assaults every year.

"These people could appeal for therapies or cures," he said.

Why does this really not surprise us? Come to think of it, why does it not surprise us that the media is picking this story up? We would also not be surprised to find out that Mr. Lorek's phone is ringing off the hook at the moment. That whole PT Barnum thing applies here, after all.

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One Response to Feeling Down Since Your Abduction?

  1. BubbaB says:

    Actually, with the rate of population growth and all, I think once a second would be more accurate.

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