New Border Defense Tested

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In an effort to increase border security on the Rio Grande River, the animal uprising has stepped in where the US government has failed. They have deployed a new border security force to the area.


Illegal migrants from Mexico frequently swim or ride inner tubes across the Rio Grande to reach the United States. Crocodiles do not normally inhabit the river, and authorities suspect it may have been brought to the area as a pet and then released into the river by its owner.

The reptile was caught on a fisherman's line on Saturday in a sparsely populated stretch of the river on the outskirts of Nuevo Laredo, across from Laredo, Texas. It was turned over to a local animal shelter.

The crocodile weighed about 130 pounds and appeared to be young and in good condition, said Jose Moreno Araiza, a commander of the Nuevo Laredo fire department, where the fishermen first brought the reptile in the back of a pickup truck.

Ok, we made up the part about it being the animal uprising's new border defense. The truth is, the animals don't really care about securing the border. (On the other hand, neither does the government, apparently). But the Crocodiles aren't fools, either. They know where they eating is good.

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