Internet addicts! They're everywhere, they're everywhere!
The United States could be rife with Internet addicts as clinically ill as alcoholics, an unprecedented study released suggested.
Researchers at Stanford University School of Medicine in Silicon Valley said their telephone survey indicated more than one of every eight US residents showed at least one sign of "problematic Internet use."
The findings backed those of previous, less rigorous studies, according to Stanford.
Most disturbing was the discovery that some people hid their Internet surfing, or went online to cure foul moods in ways that mirrored alcoholics using booze, according to the study's lead author, Elias Aboujaoude.
This is a revelation? Good Lord. Anyone with half a brain knows that there are internet addicts. They're known as bloggers.
UPDATE: Daily Pundit isn't laughing.