Experts Detect Alarming Rise In Chatter

Terrifying news has just been revealed. As has been the case before many terror attacks in the past, an alarming increase in chatter has been detected. At least 1,000 messages have been intercepted so far by increasingly sensitive intelligence gathering techniques. The remarkable increase comes at a time when tensions are rising everywhere. The most bothersome is the message just deciphered.

Those seahorses shouldn't be talking.

Increasingly scientists are discovering unusual mechanisms by which fish make and hear secret whispers, grunts and thumps to attract mates and ward off the enemy.

In just one bizarre instance, seahorses create clicks by tossing their heads. They snap the rear edge of their skulls against their star-shaped bony crests.

This and other discoveries made in recent years come as the focus on the sounds that fish make is growing beyond "really loud sounds that last a long time," fish behaviorist Timothy Tricas at the University of Hawaii at Manoa told LiveScience. "Seahorse clicks are brief, only about five to 20 milliseconds," he said.

1,000 voices

There are more than 25,000 species of fish living today, more kinds than any other animal form with a backbone in the history of the planet. A lot of them appeared to have done well in school.

"We know so far that at least 1,000 fish species make sounds, with a huge diversity of means by which they generate and listen to sounds," Tricas said. "There's only a handful we know well so far."

This is no surprise to longtime readers, of course. Terrorists from the Animal Uprising™ have been increasingly active. And chatter with a lot of those species is completely normal. But because we here at Blue Crab Boulevard are so in tune with the uprising, we immediately called the Department of Homeland Security and shouted and screamed warnings at them until they promised to send someone right around to see us. Hey! I hear sirens! Wow, that's a lot of police vehicles…..