Undermining Spain

The latest offensive in the Animal Uprising™ has been launched in the Castilla-Leon region of Spain. The entire foundation of Spain's agriculture is being undermined. Literally. A plague of voles, which are actually moles with an inferiority complex, has broken out. And Castilla-Leon is in serious danger of disappearing entirely.

Farmers say the rodents usually disappear in winter but this year that has not happened and some 500,000 hectares (1.25 million acres) of cropland in the Castilla-Leon region are being steadily gnawed away.

Castilla-Leon has some 2.1 million hectares of cultivated land and produces nearly a third of Spain's wheat and a quarter of its barley.

"These plagues are cyclical and are stopped by snow and frost, but this year the voles are not disappearing. Quite the opposite. They breed at a phenomenal rate," Donaciano Dujo, the regional president of farm union ASAJA, told Reuters.

The voles eat the leaves of grain crops, the seeds of pulses and like to burrow under the roots of alfalfa.

An ASAJA spokeswoman said there were reports that the number of vultures and eagles in the region had dropped, meaning there were fewer predators around.

Castilla-Leon is noted for its large collection of medieval castles, which will soon begin disappearing into the ground as the voles get really serious. The tourism industry will have to begin refunding deposits on castle tours. After all, all holes in the ground look very similar and people won't pay to go see them. (Well, actually, people will if the hole is large enough.) Farmers in the area have begged for help from the regional government, which has promised to immediately form a commission to study why the voles have self-esteem issues.