Hell Duck

We keep trying to warn people. But will they listen? Nooooooo. We told everyone (except those who have taken out restraining orders, we hasten to add) that the Animal Uprising™ had perfected the Florida Ring-Necked Zombie Duck in an earlier report. Said duck was shot by a hunter and thrown – dead, mind you – into a refrigerator, only to rise two days later. Now the feathered fiend has gone and died again. And has been reanimated once more.

A ring-necked duck nicknamed Perky is garnering international fame after surviving at least three brushes with death.

Perky was shot, left for dead in a refrigerator, then, as Mike Vasilinda reports, stopped breathing while a vet repaired her broken wing.

Perky spends most of her time huddled in the corner of her cage on the heating pad. She was shot by a hunter January 15 and spent the next two days his refrigerator until his wife discovered that Perky was still alive. Noni Beck has been caring for the duck ever since.

"She would normally be outside now, so that… the cold doesn't really surprise me that she made it through. You know? I guess there's enough oxygen in the refrigerator to keep the ducking going, so…"

The duck's story has traveled around our daffy world. T-shirts went on sale with the cash going to wildlife rehab. Then it appeared Perky was no longer such a lucky duck.

"It was while Perky was being operated on over the weekend to have her broken ring fixed that she stopped breathing… temporarily

"She looked dead…"

Doctor David Hale was performing the operation

"Probably 30 seconds later, you know, up comes the head and her little wings start to move and lucky the duck does what lucky the duck does so well."

We know how to make sure "Perky" stops perking. We watch all the important training films like Dawn of the Dead. All you need is a good sized cleaver. If you don't you'll have to deal with the Hell Duck without our help.