Yet Another Bad Sign
We here at Blue Crab Boulevard spend large amounts of time documenting the depravities of the Animal Uprising™. We do this thankless task out of our sense of duty to humanity. Or lack of sufficient medication, depending on how you look at it. We have not sunk to the level of watching cheese age, however. Instead, we peruse obscure news sources for alarming news of the latest dastardly deeds of the animal overlords. Which is why we find this article we found so alarming. Deer now appear to be worried about their appearance and want haircuts.
Sunday morning in downtown Williston, the City Barber Shop was closed. However, a wild deer must have known the cool weather was over and that the warm, almost-hot spring weather was here.
The full-grown deer evidently wanted a hair cut to shed its winter coat. But the Barber Shop was closed, so it crashed through one of the five-by-eight-foot plate glass windows, at about 8:30 am.
The deer was believed to have been chased downtown by some loose dogs roaming the area. The deer exited the barber shop through the same broken window and headed back to where it came from, still wearing her winter coat of hair.
Williston police said that shop owner Randy Griffis was skeptical at first, and thought someone must have thrown a rock through the window, until he saw some of the deer's hair on the floor of his shop. Police said the city's public works director, James Arrington, witnessed the entire incident.
Now, why does this worry us, you ask? Simple. If deer are now thinking about how they look, that means they are anticipating extensive leisure time in the near future. We suspect that some really major plan is in the works and that the Animal Uprising™ is about to produce a major victory.
Ok, that or the deer had a big date. Depends on how you look at it.
By Former Republican, Tuesday, 3 April , 2007 @ 7:44 pm
This is badly off-topic, but I gotta put it somewhere. My eldest granddaughter has decided she’s a “crab head” (her term). We’r taking her to the Kent Narrows tomorrow to eat hardshell.