Crazed Cow Causes Carnival Of Collisions
Winchester, Kentucky was the scene of the latest attack by the suicide squads of the Animal Uprising™. A killer cow walked out in front of a car and set off a chain reaction of accidents that reached epic proportions. Well, ok, it reached five vehicles, but you get the idea.
Five vehicles were involved in a collision early this morning on Mountain Parkway that left a cow dead and an unknown number of people injured. At about 3:20 a.m., a vehicle hit the cow at mile marker eight while traveling west. The vehicle then traveled over the median and crossed the eastbound lane of the road, landing in an embankment. An unknown number of people in that vehicle were transported to Clark Regional Medical Center with injuries. Their names were not available for release this morning.
Another vehicle then crashed after coming across the first collision. The names of the people in that vehicle were also not available for release this morning.
A tractor trailer operated by Jimmie R. Thomas of Booneville then struck the cow a second time. The collision caused a spill of diesel fuel from his truck, according to Clark County Sheriff's Deputy Paul Howard, who responded to the scene.
"It did quite a bit of damage to his truck," Howard said. The Clark County Fire Department also responded.
At 4:40 a.m., a parked vehicle belonging to the Kentucky Transportation Cabinet was struck in the rear by a car operated by Jose Alfredo M. Diaz of Louisville at mile marker nine on the parkway. The parked vehicle was at the scene to assist with the earlier collisions. The vehicle was parked on the left side of the eastbound lane with its overhead lights illuminated.
It appears that the animals have diverted the deer to chasing (and catching) airplanes, so the cows are being sent out onto the roads. This is not good news for drivers of subcompact cars. Cows are pretty beefy, you know.
By Blackhawk, Monday, 9 April , 2007 @ 7:53 pm
Dern city slickers. Don’t know the first thing about cow tipping.
Or maybe this is the cow version?
On a serious note, I hope no one was seriously hurt (except the cow…Darwin at work).