The Tale Of The Giant Rats Of Chicago

No, no, no. Not the politicians. Well, them, too. But we're talking an entire rodent army here. And they are undermining the entire city. Now some might say that Chicago being swallowed by the earth isn't necessarily a bad thing, we here at Blue Crab Boulevard would miss it. It's been a target-rich environment for blog material. Of course city hall says they're winning the war on rats, but the rat man says otherwise:

'Rat Man" George Manning knows all about the little furry terrors spotted swimming in hot tubs and terrorizing posh Lincoln Park.

"Had a lady on Mohawk have a rat come up her toilet," Rat Man says.

So it's no surprise rats were a campaign issue in the race for 43rd Ward alderman.

"All over the ward people say, 'If you do anything, get rid of the rats.' They're the worst they've ever been," says Ald. Vi Daly's unsuccessful challenger, Michele Smith. "A rat the size of a small cat ran across my path while we were canvassing."

"Nope, no surprise to me. We're talking total infestation," says Rat Man, whose rat resume starts when he was 6 years old and a rat bit him.

He started killing rats for beer money as a student at Purdue University, and has been doing ever since. For a while, he left behind sewers to make a foray into politics — failed bids for mayor in '77 and 32nd Ward alderman in '81. He certainly encountered rats then, too.

Get Rat Man talking about Norwegian rats, and his eyes get big: Whole sections of streets and sidewalks could collapse thanks to burrowing rats. Rat man says some might say that makes him sound like a nut. (Ed Note: Norwegian rats? Sven, what have you been up to?)

"But I'm not a nut. I'm an activist."

So rats are gobbling up Chicago? Rat Man says they're digging elaborate rat mansions under busy streets, erroding sewers that are already like Swiss cheese and using them as delicatessens and "superhighways."

Despite Rat Man's prophecies, Chicago's rodent-hunters say they've got rats on the run. Mayor Daley's Dumpster Task Force tickets business owners with rat-friendly conditions like leaking grease bins and overflowing trash in alleys. Then, they go inside restaurant kitchens and grocery stores to look for indoor rats and other pests.

The city has printed up pamphlets saying they have decreased the rat population from 6 million to 500,000. So they must have taken a rat census. But rats are notorious liars when it comes to answering census taker's questions, so that is highly suspect. But what's going to happen when one of the Al Gore sized rat mansions collapses? Hmmmm? If you thought the potholes were bad before, just wait.

Good Lord

Alan Dershowitz has just launched a devastating attack on Jimmy Carter, who Dershowitz used to work for. This is very, very serious stuff.

Recent disclosures of Carter's extensive financial connections  to Arab oil money, particularly from Saudi Arabia, had deeply shaken my belief in his integrity. When I was first told that he received a  monetary reward in the name of Shiekh Zayed bin Sultan Al Nahayan, and kept the money, even after Harvard returned money from the same source because of its anti-Semitic history, I simply did not believe it. How  could a man of such apparent integrity enrich himself with dirty money  from so dirty a source?
 
And let there be no mistake about how dirty the Zayed Foundation is. I know because I was involved, in a small way, in helping to persuade Harvard University to return more than $2 million that the financially strapped Divinity School received from this source.  Initially, I was reluctant to put pressure on Harvard to turn back money  for the Divinity School, but then a student at the Divinity School, Rachael Lea Fish showed me the facts.  

They were staggering. I was amazed that in the twenty-first  century there were still foundations that espoused these views. The Zayed Centre for Coordination and Follow-up, a think-tank funded by the Shiekh and run by his son, hosted speakers who called Jews "the enemies of all nations," attributed the assassination of John Kennedy to Israel and the Mossad and the 9/11 attacks to the United States' own military, and stated that the Holocaust was a "fable." (They also hosted a speech by Jimmy Carter.) To its credit, Harvard turned the money back. To his discredit, Carter did not.

It actually gets worse for Carter from there:

The Carter Center's mission statement claims that "The Center is nonpartisan and acts as a neutral party in dispute resolution activities." How can that be, given that its coffers are full of Arab money, and that its focus is away from significant Arab abuses and on Israel's far less serious ones?

No reasonable person can dispute therefore that Jimmy Carter has been and remains dependent on Arab oil money, particularly from Saudi  Arabia. Does this mean that Carter has necessarily been influenced in  his thinking about the Middle East by receipt of such enormous amounts of money? Ask Carter.

The entire premise of his criticism of Jewish influence on American foreign policy is that money talks. It is Carter, not me, who has made the point that if politicians receive money from  Jewish sources, then they are not free to decide issues regarding the Middle East for themselves. It is Carter, not me, who has argued that distinguished reporters cannot honestly report on the Middle East  because they are being paid by Jewish money. So, by Carter's own  standards, it would be almost economically "suicidal" for Carter "to espouse a balanced position between Israel and Palestine."

By Carter's own standards, therefore, his views on the Middle East must be discounted. It is certainly possible that he now believes them. Money, particularly large amounts of money, has a way of persuading people to a particular position. It would not surprise me if Carter, having received so much Arab money, is now honestly committed to their cause. But his failure to disclose the extent of his financial dependence on Arab money, and the absence of any self reflection on  whether the receipt of this money has unduly influenced his views, is a form of deception bordering on corruption.

I have long held Jimmy Carter in contempt - I had the misfortune of living through his misbegotten presidency. But this is absolutely breathtaking. That Carter has long been a biased - badly biased - figure in the world should have been pretty apparent to even the the most clueless. Carter has never, apparently, found a dictator he couldn't feel good about. But Dershowitz makes a very strong case that Carter is bought and paid for. And Michael Moore tried to charge that the Bush family had Saudi ties. No wonder the two were so chummy at the 2004 Democratic convention. They were covering one another.

History will judge Jimmy Carter very, very harshly. Much more so than I can.

Bag Limit

I link to a fair number of stories in the British Daily Mail. They usually have something or other that interests or amuses. Today, they have something just a wee bit underhanded going on, though. This is, quite frankly, a journalistic hit piece - and, it turns out, the Daily Mail has a financial interest in the reporting of the story.

The designer bag seen as the icon of a green rebellion against plastic carriers has suffered an eco-backlash.

It has emerged that the I'm Not A Plastic Bag creation of designer Anya Hindmarch was made with cheap labour in China.

The £5 re-usable bag was then sea-freighted thousands of miles to Britain, which will have generated carbon emissions.

The details have drawn criticism from environmentalists and MPs who say it risks bringing the green movement into disrepute……

…..Revelations that the bag is made in factories in China, where labour costs are a fraction of those in Britain, may embarrass We Are What We Do - the group behind the concept - together with the designer and Sainsbury's.

Here's the kicker in the tut-tutting piece decrying the Chinese-made bag:

By contrast, an eco-bag being offered to readers by the Daily Mail is Fairtrade certified and comes from factories in India, where staff are guaranteed good standards of pay and working conditions.

The suppliers of the cotton are guaranteed fair play and a fair price for their crops.

As a result, Fairtrade bags supplied from India generally attract a wholesale price which is around three times higher than those from Chinese producers.

Now, frankly, this is bag is also manufactured all the way across the world in India and didn't magically appear in Britain transported by the carbon-neutral fairy, did it? And the Mail selling one bag while trying to whack the other bag is pretty cheesy. Both bags are about pious posturing and feel-good-about-yourself, not about any realistic savings to the environment. Sort of like Al Gore and his gargantuan energy consumption being piously blessed away by the purchase of indulgences. (Which the makers of the first bag claim they have purchased to offset the sea voyage of the feel-good bags). Over the long run, if someone uses the bag - wherever it came from - long enough, they will have eventually saved some use of plastic. But only if they use it long enough (I have no idea how long that period is, I have no figures to work with). Will the use of the bag hit a break-even point? Maybe. But it it the salvation of the entire globe. You have got to be completely off your rocker to think so. It's a tote bag for heaven's sake.

(And, incidentally, tote bags have been around pretty much forever. I'll bet we have at least a dozen or so laying around the house used for various purposes, or gathering dust. There's that "used long enough" thing.) 

Welcome To Totalitarian America

Gee, what was it the other day? George Bush is setting up a fascist state in ten easy steps? I guess he must be under-achieving there. Dan Simpson, a member of the editorial boards of The Toledo Blade and Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, has written a column that achieves the entire goal of complete totalitarian control in one simple step.

Take away everyone's guns.

Read this carefully because Simpson obviously thinks this is just peachy keen and something which should be considered (you have to assume that since he put it out for publication):

Now, how would one disarm the American population? First of all, federal or state laws would need to make it a crime punishable by a $1,000 fine and one year in prison per weapon to possess a firearm. The population would then be given three months to turn in their guns, without penalty.

Hunters would be able to deposit their hunting weapons in a centrally located arsenal, heavily guarded, from which they would be able to withdraw them each hunting season upon presentation of a valid hunting license. The weapons would be required to be redeposited at the end of the season on pain of arrest. When hunters submit a request for their weapons, federal, state, and local checks would be made to establish that they had not been convicted of a violent crime since the last time they withdrew their weapons. In the process, arsenal staff would take at least a quick look at each hunter to try to affirm that he was not obviously unhinged.

It would have to be the case that the term "hunting weapon" did not include anti-tank ordnance, assault weapons, rocket-propelled grenade launchers, or other weapons of war.

All antique or interesting non-hunting weapons would be required to be delivered to a local or regional museum, also to be under strict 24-hour-a-day guard. There they would be on display, if the owner desired, as part of an interesting exhibit of antique American weapons, as family heirlooms from proud wars past or as part of collections.

Gun dealers could continue their work, selling hunting and antique firearms. They would be required to maintain very tight inventories. Any gun sold would be delivered immediately by the dealer to the nearest arsenal or the museum, not to the buyer.

The disarmament process would begin after the initial three-month amnesty. Special squads of police would be formed and trained to carry out the work. Then, on a random basis to permit no advance warning, city blocks and stretches of suburban and rural areas would be cordoned off and searches carried out in every business, dwelling, and empty building. All firearms would be seized. The owners of weapons found in the searches would be prosecuted: $1,000 and one year in prison for each firearm.

Clearly, since such sweeps could not take place all across the country at the same time. But fairly quickly there would begin to be gun-swept, gun-free areas where there should be no firearms. If there were, those carrying them would be subject to quick confiscation and prosecution. On the streets it would be a question of stop-and-search of anyone, even grandma with her walker, with the same penalties for "carrying."

What a wonderful world of civil liberties that would be, no?

Special squads of police. No notice searches. Fines. Imprisonment.

One assumes the "Special Squads" will have twin lightning bolt collar buttons to go along with their initials. (Those who read here regularly know that I do not use even a hint of the term fascist without very good cause.) Regular readers also know I have a firm policy about language on this blog. That is being tested severely right now. This is exactly why the founders included the second amendment in the Bill of Rights, incidentally.

My son wanted me to point out that the techniques Mr. Simpson cheerfully advocates were used once before. But that time the contraband being seized happened to be Jews.

And Mr. Simpson, I don't think you're a "crazed liberal zealot" at all. I think you're something much more dangerous and contemptible.

But I am late to this party: Captain's Quarters, Confederate Yankee, Leibowitz's Canticle, Little Green Footballs, Volokh, Hot Air, NewsBusters, protein wisdom,

UPDATE: Dan Riehl dug up an anti-Jewish-American lobby editorial that Simpson wrote in 2004. So perhaps the real intent of the cordon and sweep is to actually round up more than the guns, eh? (That language thing of mine is really, really, really being tested right now.)

Like A Bull In A…..

….Two car garage. An 81-year old woman got a rude introduction to the Animal Uprising™ when a bull decided he should be in the garage instead of her car. And he was in the mood for a turf war.

HEBRON, N.Y. - A woman pulled into her driveway and spotted something big inside her garage. That something turned out to be a bull. And an angry bull at that.

Mabel Washburn says she drove to a nearby relative's home in rural Washington County to call police after coming face to face with the bull on Wednesday afternoon. When she returned to her home near the Vermont border a few minutes later, the bull was still there.

The 81-year-old woman says the animal then rammed its horns into her Ford Escort a couple of times. She blew her horn at it, but the bull chased the vehicle as she drove away.

So the bull won the day and drove her car from the garage. Our informants tell us that the bull is now setting up his dream business in the new space. A china shop.

(We desperately need some new informants).

A Plague Of Squirrels

Actually, it's worse than that. It is actually squirrels with plague. A dead squirrel found in downtown Denver, Colorado died from bubonic plague.

DENVER — A dead tree squirrel found near City Park east of downtown Denver tested positive for bubonic plague, according to the Colorado Department of Public Health.

A person near the park noticed several dead squirrels in the neighborhood and reported the die off to Denver Animal Control..

In a release, John Pape, an epidemiologist who specializes in animal-related diseases for the department's Disease Control and Environmental Epidemiology Division, said, "Plague is a disease seen every year among rodent populations in rural areas of Colorado, including the Front Range. It is unusual to find plague in the center of an urban area although it has happened before." In Colorado, plague-infected animals are most likely found in the foothills and mountains, he added.

The risk to humans is small, but it is there. Authorities are warning residents of Denver not to touch dead rodents or rabbits and to keep their pets away from them. If you must pick up a dead animal, wear gloves and put the carcass in a plastic bag. Call the CO-HELP (Colorado Health Education Line for the Public) at 877-462-2911 to report a dead animal. (Obviously, it is also a very good idea to seek medical treatment at once if bitten or scratched, but that is a pretty rare occurrence. Keep an eye on your pets, though.) Pass the word to anyone you know in Denver.

A Day At The Spa

Franklin Township, New Jersey, was the scene of the latest attempt at animal beautification that we warned about earlier. The deer brigades of the Animal Uprising™ have suddenly developed an interest in haircuts. But they seem to have a bit of trouble understanding the concept of doors. They keep crashing through the windows. This upsets the stylists so much that the deer never do get their haircuts.

(CBS 3) FRANKLIN TOWNSHIP, N.J. A deer became an unexpected guest at a Gloucester County hair salon when it slammed through a glass window.

The deer launched itself head-first through the window of Salon Leezae in Franklin Township at about 2:30 p.m. Thursday while the salon was packed with customers.

Surveillance cameras in the salon captured video of the animal leaping over a customer before landing in the lobby. After flailing around for a few seconds, the deer made a grand exit, jumping back out the gaping hole it left in the window.

"I just couldn’t believe it; we really were in shock," store owner Lisa Vicheto-Scapellato said.

Lisa's daughter and her friend, in the salon for 'Bring Your Daughter to Work Day,' had a front seat view and said at first they thought it was a car because the crash was so loud.

"No one would think that the deer would just jump right through the window," Lisa's daughter said.

Obviously, she doesn't read Blue Crab Boulevard or she would have been expecting it. They have video at the link, but the surveillance camera footage is of typically horrible resolution and it is difficult to see the details.

(Side note: I have never seen this many "deer crashing through window" stories at nearly the same time before. The deer overpopulation problem in a lot of areas promises to make this sort of thing even more common in the future. There's something to look forward to. Not.)

No Cover

The Chicago Tribune - having already fired a warning shot across the bow of the SS Pelosi, drives home the flat stupidity of the effort to pass a supplemental spending bill with timetables for troop withdrawals. No more media cover, Nancy and Harry. You're on your own now.

 Democrats — who prevailed in narrow votes in the House and Senate — recognize that there is a deep public unease over the extended U.S. involvement in Iraq. You won't find a U.S. citizen who doesn't dearly hope that this nation will be able to begin a withdrawal by Oct. 1, as the bill demands.

 And maybe the U.S. will be in position to do that. But establishing a congressionally mandated timetable for withdrawal would straitjacket the ability of Gen. David Petraeus, the top commander on the ground, to pursue the stabilization of Iraq as events and conditions warrant.

Sen. Harry Reid said recently the war is "lost." This legislation would all but guarantee it.

The narrow votes in the House and Senate establish that Democrats won't be able to override a presidential veto. So now that they've gone through the process of approving legislation that won't become law, the question is: What next?

After the bill is vetoed, Democrats will have a choice. They could try to starve the war effort by refusing to approve money for it. The Pentagon says it can pay for the Iraq war with existing funds only through June.

The alternative: decide that they have made their point and give Petraeus and his troops the flexibility they need to pursue their mission. And that's what Democrats need to do. Capitol Hill can't run a war.

If the Democratic leadership continues on it's quest to pander to the left, they will face an increasingly hostile media. This is just about as clear and open a warning as an editorial can make and still try to sound objective. Democrats were not given a mandate to lose a war. Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi are well on their way toward being widely reviled in the Democratic party.

Looming Crisis

Just to point out that there are no easy solutions to a lot of complex problems, the media has just noticed what nuclear utilities noticed several years ago: there is a shortage of nuclear workers which only threatens to get worse if new plants actually get built. The problem? Not enough people studying nuclear engineering.

 WASHINGTON (Reuters) - When the top U.S. nuclear regulator addressed industry leaders in March, he spoke about a problem often neglected in public debates about nuclear energy: the threat of a labor shortage.

"Where are we going to get the educated and skilled workers to safely run the current fleet (of reactors) over extended lifetimes and the potential nuclear plants of the future?" asked Dale Klein, chairman of the Nuclear Regulatory Commission. "Where are they being educated? Where are they being trained?"

The U.S. government, energy experts and even some environmentalists see a revival of nuclear power as a clean energy alternative, but that resurgence may be held up by a lack of qualified workers.

As nuclear power went out of fashion in the wake of the Three Mile Island disaster in 1979, college nuclear engineering programs were shuttered and fewer workers have entered the field.

Some 103 reactors currently generate about 20 percent of U.S. electricity, with the last one coming on line in 1996 in Tennessee.

That number could increase. A new focus on global warming, which most scientist say is caused by gases emitted by burning fossil fuels, has brought coal-, oil- and gas-fired generation under scrutiny. While nuclear reactors produce radioactive waste, they do not emit greenhouse gases, and energy experts say a new nuclear plant could break ground as early as 2010.

Financial incentives laced through a 2005 energy law have some excited about a "nuclear renaissance."

But the nuclear engineers and technicians who landed their jobs in the 1970s are retiring and there are few trained to take their places.

Carol Berrigan, who researches nuclear infrastructure for the Nuclear Energy Institute, the industry's lobby group, described the coming labor shortage as a "looming trend."

A 2005 study by the Institute found that half of the industry's employees were over 47 years old, while less than 8 percent of employees were younger than 32. Most Americans retire after turning 65, and the survey found more than a quarter of nuclear workers were already eligible to stop working.

Even the government's regulator, the NRC, is scrambling to add 200 new employees this year just to monitor the sector, Klein said.

The utilities I worked at noticed this problem some time ago - not just in the nuclear field, incidentally. There are very few colleges offering power engineering these days. So most utilities (the article notes this) have put aggressive recruiting programs in place to try to get engineering students lined up to work in the field before they even graduate. The problem is particularly acute in the nuclear industry, which this article is discussing.

More Dead News

We brought you the stories of dead people parking their cars in Chicago (home of the dead vote - makes sense). We informed you about the problem with zombie joyriders in Australia. Recently, we noted the Malaysian courts prosecuting the dead. Now Indonesia, apparently in an attempt to keep up with the rest of the world, has developed a totally new take on the dead. Or undead, as the case may be.

Zombie commuters.

Anxious family members found the body of Edy Haryanto, 55, sitting in a locked lavatory on Thursday afternoon, more than a day after he had boarded with a group of friends in the central Javanese town of Tegal, the Warta Kota newspaper reported.

His family became worried when Haryanto didn't get out at the station in Jakarta at the end of the 6-hour journey and his cell phone went unanswered.

The body traveled back and forth between Tegal and Jakarta before a janitor told the family he had been unable to clean one lavatory because the door was locked, the report said.

Haryanto was riding the train for at least half a day before he was discovered.

Interesting Dilemma

The Washington Post has an interesting little article that indicates the kind of problems Utility companies face along with an interesting states rights versus Federal regulation debate. The Post reports that U.S. Energy Secretary Samuel W. Bodman has intervened in the case of a much-disputed case of some large utility transmission lines in two areas of the country, the Southwest and the Mid-Atlantic regions. He declared them to be "national interest" corridors, which gives the utilities involved the ability to appeal state regulatory decisions to the Federal Energy Regulatory Commission (FERC). Two Republican members of Congress are leading the opposition to the decision.

The move will "set us on the path to modernize our constrained and congested electric power infrastructure," Bodman said in a statement. "I am confident the department's actions will help facilitate the infrastructure growth necessary to meet the demands of our growing economy."

Some energy specialists lauded Bodman's announcement, saying that power line construction nationwide has been slow in the past few decades, partly because of local opposition. That has left the grid vulnerable to the kind of blackout that occurred in New York in 2003, they say.

The mid-Atlantic region identified by Bodman would include parts of Virginia, Maryland, Ohio, Pennsylvania and New York and all of New Jersey, Delaware and the District.

A spokesman for U.S. Rep. Frank R. Wolf (R-Va.), who has opposed Dominion's effort to build a 500,000-volt transmission line, said the decision intrudes on the rights of states to decide what is best for their residents.

"Shouldn't a state have a say instead of being run roughshod over?" spokesman Dan Scandling said. "That's the crux of the issue. While there may be a need in New England, does that mean the pristine areas of Virginia should be destroyed for the sake of New York City?"

Wolf and U.S. Rep. Thomas M. Davis III (R-Va.) support a bill that would do away with the "national interest" designations, which were called for by the 2005 Energy Policy Act. They have penned a second bill that at least would require the federal government to consider the impact on private property, historical sites and other factors before designating a national interest corridor.

This happens to be a subject that I have a little bit of background in. The blocking of construction of these lines by well-connected environmental activists through the years has put a lot of stress on the existing power grid. In many cases, badly needed new capacity has been blocked for years or even canceled. (This is one of the reasons I laugh when the pie-in-the-sky advocates demand construction of wind farms in rural areas to support the cities - how are you going to get the power there?) The problem has been going on for years at the state and local level and some areas of the grid are severely impacted by the lack of new transmission capacity.

Yet there is a lot to be said for keeping the Federal government out of these kinds of decisions, too. Where the crisis point is going to come is when the grid collapses under too much stress - likely on a brutally hot day when a major power plant trips.  Then, of course, people will be screaming bloody murder for the Federal government to do something.

GREAT News!

For those of us without a private Lear Jet, no Gulfstream, zero stretch limos, lacking a 20,000 square foot humble abode, no hint of the gobs of cash necessary to bribe force convince some poor, suffering schmuck in the third world to take the carbon bullet for us or otherwise just not up to inclusion in the exclusive Most Exalted Pope Goreus I Carbon Offset  Indulgence Club®©™¥, there is an alternative! Carbon Neutral Blogging!

Our blogs are posted on carbon-neutral Web servers, using certified organic computer personnel and biodegradable pixels. That means when you link to our blogs, you’re actually helping to fight global warming.

Why, I feel like a planetary saviour already! Move over, Al!

UPDATE: We here at blue Crab Boulevard have taken our new role as environmental saviours so seriously that we are proud to announce the formation of the Blue Crab Beneficent Carbon Trading Hegemony™! For an obscene modest fee, we will assure you that our industrious army of blue crabs will plant seaweed sprouts! Really! Honest! You'll be carbon neutral just like Al in no time at all! So please send your money to us via our bank in the Cayman Islands. Small, used bills with non-sequential serial numbers only, please. We have seaweed waiting to be planted!

Personally, I’d Sue

Bob Owens has made what I think is an extremely significant catch. The Associated Press printed a story in which they claim an anonymous police source told them that some of the magazines used by the Virginia Tech killer were purchased at Dick's Sporting Goods. Then another Newspaper took it a step further and quotes an anonymous police source as saying magazines were purchased at both Dick's and at Wal-Mart. (Bob says New York Times, but the link comes up to the San Francisco Chronicle).

These are flat lies. Not misstatements, lies. Neither store carries magazines for pistols. Period. Bob checked.

I called the Dick's locations in Christiansburg and Roanoke this evening and I spoke with employees in the hunting department (called "the Lodge"). They confirmed what I already knew from visiting Dick's locations in New York and North Carolina over the past five years; while the chain carries ammunition, they've never carried pistols or pistol magazines.

I spoke with the young lady in the sporting good department of the Christiansburg Walmart, which took a bit longer than the Dick's calls. I had to first explain to her that when I was asking about "pistol magazines" I was not talking about handgun-related periodicals. Once that point was clarified, I confirmed that Walmart do not sell ammunition holding devices for pistols, either.

Two of the nation's top news organizations are telling hundreds of thousands of news consumers demonstrable lies because journalists were/are too lazy to spend the minimal amount of time it takes (three calls in five minutes) to fact-check an anonymous source regarding claims made about two huge retail store chains and their role in this nation's largest mass murder shooting.

If the media is this lazy investigating the facts of the largest mass shooting in American history just a little more than one week after it occurred, I can only imagine how little effort they put into more pedestrian stories.

If I were in a position of authority at either retailer, I would be screaming - through some very high priced legal talent - for an immediate, high-profile retraction. Or I would damn sure try to sue the hell out of the media that printed this. Because this crosses into malicious. These allegations can be shown to be untrue with very little effort. That has a really good chance for rising above the "absent malice" standard.

This Is Spinal Gore

Well, Al Gore has done the improbable. He has reunited a completely fictional band for his Save the Earth concert series (we could say something here about his completely fictional cause, but we'll be nice). Anyway, he convinced the actors who played the parts of the fictional British band Spinal Tap to get back together for one last chance at turning the amps up to "11".

The group, comprising of guitarist Nigel Tufnel (played by Christopher Guest), singer David St. Hubbins (Michael McKean) and bassist Derek Smalls (Harry Shearer), rose to cult stardom following the 1984 “mockumentary” This is Spinal Tap.

The film, which catalogued an aging British band’s desperate comeback tour of America, provided a generation of students with catch phrases such as “none more black” and “smell the glove.”

Scenes from the film - including one in which Tufnel patiently explains to an interviewer that the band’s amplifiers can be turned up to eleven for that “extra push over the cliff” - are regarded by many comedians as among the funniest ever written.

Although the film fared badly in cinemas - many audience members thought it was a badly-made genuine documentary - it became a cult hit after its release on video.

The film also spawned a conventional career of sorts for the band, with occasional concert performances and an album.

Nothing, however, has been heard of the three-piece since their 1992 record Break Like the Wind. As part of their Live Earth contribution, Spinal Tap have reportedly recorded a 15 minute “consciousness raising” film looking at climate change, which features them driving around in their 4×4s and leaving all the lights on in their mansions. (Ed Note: My Heavens, they are actually channeling Al Gore!)

The short film, directed by This is Spinal Tap director Rob Reiner, will show the world what the rockers have been up to over the past 15 years.

Tufnel has been raising miniature horses to race but cannot find jockeys small enough to ride them. St. Hubbins is a hip-hop producer who also owns a colonic clinic. Smalls is in rehab for internet addiction.

We, of course, have to point out that the last American tour, as detailed in the film, didn't exactly go as planned. There was a problem with the set. Specifically, the size of the set. But they haven't seen anything yet.

Russia Withdraws From Arms Treaty In Europe

Vladimir Putin announced that Russia was "suspending" participation in the Conventional Forces in Europe (CFE) Treaty today purportedly in response to US plans to deploy 10 anti-ballistic missiles in Poland. Even the British press isn't buying that excuse.

Announcing a suspension of Moscow’s participation in the Conventional Forces in Europe (CFE) Treaty, president Vladimir Putin accused the United States of a plot to build up its military forces on Russia’s western borders.

“Our partners are conducting themselves incorrectly to say the least, gaining one-sided advances,” Mr Putin said in his annual state-of-the-nation address.

“They are using the complicated situation to expand military bases near our borders. Moreover they plan to locate elements of a missile defence system in the Czech Republic and Poland.”

Already strained relations between the two Cold War superpowers deteriorated markedly when the Pentagon announced plans to deploy 10 interceptor missiles in Poland and a radar system in the Czech Republic…….

…….Analysts suggested there was a certain amount of posturing in Mr Putin’s speech.

Already regarded as an energy superpower, Russia is desperate to be taken seriously as a military power, too. Defence spending has quadrupled since Mr Putin came to power in 2000, and an ambitious strategy to modernize the military was announced last year, including plans to develop a new generation of ballistic missiles capable of breaching US defences.

With these grandiose plans under his belt, Mr Putin is aggrieved that he is not being given the respect he feels he deserves by the United States, analysts say.

Washington has dragged its feet on Russian proposals for a new bilateral treaty on reducing nuclear weapons, similar to those signed during the Cold War, which would give Mr Putin enormous domestic prestige.

“The aim is not to secure the country against an unexpected US attack, but to demonstrate that Russia is a worthy partner of the world’s most powerful state,” said Alexander Golts, a military analyst in Moscow.

Putin appears to be bothered by the fact that Russia is not the number one concern of the US any longer. So we have an authoritarian, mafia-style kleptocracy with an inferiority complex. And there is surprise that Russia is blocking any real progress at stopping Iran's nuclear weapons program? The argument that Putin puts forward is absurd on its face. Ten missiles will have zilch chance of stopping all of Russia's missiles and Moscow knows it. The anti-missile shield is meant for stopping Iran. The Russians always had more warheads than the US - putting together warheads was like a hobby for the soviets. They always counted on massive overkill because the accuracy of their delivery systems could not match what the US had. But if Europe caves, they will be completely at the mercy of the Iranians very shortly.