Penguin Invasion Denialists
Some "scientists" are ignoring the consensus among imminently qualified, bona fide experts (the readers of Blue Crab Boulevard) that the Animal Uprising™ is sending penguin invasion fleets against the Northern hemisphere. They say its all the human's fault.
A Humboldt penguin known only from the Southern Hemisphere but recently found thousands of miles from home likely was a stowaway on a fishing ship, say scientists.
The seemingly peripatetic penguin turned up in July 2002 when fisherman Guy Demmert netted an atypical batch of salmon off the coast of southeast Alaska. There among the salmon was the Humboldt penguin that somehow had strayed a nearly impossible distance from where the species lives.
When sightings of penguins in northern waters occur, including Demmert's find, they present a puzzle of sorts for scientists: All of Earth's 17 penguin species live primarily in the Southern Hemisphere. The Galápagos penguin is the only one with a habitat that extends somewhat north of the equator. So how would any of these flightless birds manage to voyage deep into the Northern Hemisphere?
A marathon swim (or waddle) is unlikely, partly because the birds are ill-equipped for the range of climate conditions found along the way, according to two University of Washington biologists, Dee Boersma and Amy Van Buren, who conducted research on errant penguins that is detailed in the June issue of the Wilson Journal of Ornithology.
Zoo escapees? Not likely either, they say. While penguins were routinely shipped from the south to zoos in North America in the past, international regulations that prohibited such trade were adopted in 1972, so all shipments ceased.
But the animal overlords are not signatories to those treaties, are they? We're supposed to dismiss the evidence of penguin invasions. One of those, "Who are you going to believe, me or your lying eyes?" moments? Hah! They even have evidence of the fleets that they chose to ignore:
- In 1944, a Humboldt penguin was reported off British Columbia’s Queen Charlotte Islands.
- In 1975, a penguin was spotted near Long Beach in Washington.
- In 1978, up to three Humboldts were seen off the coast of Vancouver Island, British Columbia.
- In 1985, a penguin was reported off the coast of Washington.
And that doesn't even account for the recent invasion of Brazil by penguins! They were hitting on the bikini babes looking for dates! We here at Blue Crab Boulevard are heartily sick of these so-called scientists who are obviously funded by the animal lobby. We're developing an Animal Uprising™ Denialist Database® so we can keep a close eye on them.
By TC@LeatherPenguin, Tuesday, 5 June , 2007 @ 9:47 pm
Not part of the Animal Uprisingâ„¢, Gaius.
Family reunion weekend is scheduled for early July and this idiot was too cheap to pay for a plane ticket.