Not "Arrr, Matey", ARGH, as in an expression of dismay and frustration. Six-year old Morgan Smith of Stone, Staffordshire, England will not be having his pirate-themed birthday party. It seems the local council has decreed that flying the jolly roger is "unneighborly" and has made the family take the flag down. Oh, they can get a permit to fly the flag for the party. But only after paying a £75 fee and having an "impact assessment" performed.
As his sixth birthday approached, Morgan Smith's parents thought hoisting the Jolly Roger would be the perfect way to make the pirate-mad youngster's day.
The flag was duly run up the pole in the back garden, leaving Morgan looking forward to a party on Saturday with lots of friends wearing eyepatches and wielding toy cutlasses.
But little did the family know that out on the treacherous high seas of bureaucracy, trouble was heading their way.
Council officials branded the skull and crossbones flag "unneighbourly" and banned Morgan's parents Richard and Sharon from flying it.
The couple must apply for planning permission at a cost of £75, and then an assessment of the 5ft by 4ft flag's "impact" on the surrounding area of Stone, Staffordshire, will be undertaken.
The intervention has sunk the plans for a pirate-themed party.
Morgan's 40-year-old father, an engineer at Bentley Motors, said: "It's not as though I'm building a huge extension which will blight the neighbourhood. It's a child's pirate flag.
"Morgan is really upset because I'd told him we could have a pirate party for his birthday with him and his friends all coming dressed as pirates.
"The skull and crossbones was to be the centrepiece. We'll wait to see if the Jolly Roger is approved and if so we'll hold the party at a later date."
For years, the patriotic family have flown a Union Jack or a St George's flag on the 18ft-high flagstaff at their detached home without a problem, but a neighbour complained to the council about the Jolly Roger.
Methinks it's time for the council to take a long walk off a short plank. Arrr.
Is there nothing that liberals won’t work to destroy?
Ps: you owe me £75 for posting a pirate related story
Arrrr.
This is a disheartening Arr-ticle. But, ’tis best they comply, else they could get Arr-ested. Maybe they could go to Arrr-bitration instead?
Seriously, though, as obnoxious as it is for the local government to stick its nose in, did the parents really have to nix the party because they couldn’t fly a pirate flag? I didn’t follow the link, but it seems that they weren’t restricted from holding the party, just hoisting that particular flag. Just have the party sans flag.
Who the hell complains about a pirate flag? Methinks the neighbour’s house should be plundered by the tykes.