Elephants Invade Canada
A typical evening at the 911 call center in Newmarket, Ontario, Canada:
"Hi, um, we've found an elephant walking down the street," the unidentified man says in a recording of an emergency call to police, repeating it twice to a seemingly bewildered policeman.
"How big are we talking about?" the officer responds.
"A full grown elephant," he shouts. "It's following one of my friends."
And some doubters still question the Animal Uprising™. Pachyderm stalkers on the streets of a quiet Canadian city, undoubtedly looking for trouble, and there are still those who think we are making this stuff up.
OTTAWA (AFP) - It was no dream. Two elephants seen roaming the streets of a sleepy town in central Canada in the wee hours of the morning had actually escaped from a traveling circus, police said Thursday.
The massive pachyderms, named Bunny and Suzy, had escaped from Garden Bros. Circus at about 3 a.m. in Newmarket, near Toronto, when an electric fence around their pen was inadvertently disabled.
Police said the elephants took a "stroll" around town and "snacked on several nearby trees," but did not cause any injuries or property damage.
An astonished resident awakened by their stomping and chewing before dawn notified police, who helped steer the animals back to their pen.
"Inadvertently disabled" indeed. The pair of ponderous, predatory pachyderms were obviously released by accomplices - we'd keep a close eye on the monkeys, they're good with electrical devices. Well aside from that misfortune Curious George had with the fuse box. But we digress. We would just like to point out that Newmarket is not far from Toronto and Yonge Street. Where the pair would not have even raised an eyebrow. They could have carried out their insidious plans with impunity. (Those who have been to Yonge Street, especially near the Eaton Centre, know we speak the truth here.)
By Bleepless, Friday, 13 July , 2007 @ 7:39 pm
Yup. That’s it. Ordinarily, squirrels are the best for reconnaisance but using elephants is solidly in line with the basic principle, Hide in Plain Sight. Whoever would suspect them? I bet that town is within 500 miles or so of a major military or intelligence or administrative or media or whatever site.