We here at Blue Crab Boulevard have spent countless hours documenting the depravities of the Animal Uprising™, especially the behavior of the reptile legions. The alligator brigades have perfected the art of disguise and have managed to camouflage themselves as doormats, luggage and even golf balls. But now they have an even more potentially deadly disguise.
They are dressing up as pillows.
BABYLON, N.Y. – A peace officer for the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals happened across a moving pillowcase on a beach Saturday on which someone had written: "Live Gator — Please find him a home," officials said.
The off-duty officer for the Suffolk County organization had been taking a walk on Long Island's Overlook beach, according to the group. The officer called in a response team to rescue the 30-inch-long animal.
Don't be surprised when you go to bed tonight if your pillow bites you. As a precaution, we here in the Crabitat have taken to beating our pillows with a 9 iron prior to going to bed. We recommend that strategy to our readers, especially if they don't mind sleeping on the couch. Spouses sometimes fail to see the dangers involved.
