Zombie Snake Attacks Man

And not just any zombie snake. A beheaded zombie rattlesnake very nearly claimed a human victim. Danny Anderson and his son, Benjamin, pinned a rattlesnake with a length of pipe, then beheaded it with a shovel. Then beat heck out of the head for good measure. But when Anderson reached for the severed head, all hell broke loose.

"When I reached down to pick up the head, it raised around and did a backflip almost, and bit my finger," Anderson said. "I had to shake my hand real hard to get it to let loose."

The snake head ended up in the bed of his pickup and Anderson landed in Kadlec Medical Center until Wednesday afternoon.

"I was mad that he scooped that out with his hand, and I was scared because I didn't know what to do," said his wife, Linda Anderson.

At first, Danny Anderson didn't want to go to a hospital but his wife insisted.

And by the time they raced the 10 minutes to Prosser Memorial Hospital, his tongue was swollen, and the venom was spreading from his index finger to the rest of his body.

"It felt like someone was holding my hand in a fire pit," said the repairman for Rowand Machinery. "It was one of the worst pains I ever had."

But it didn't end there.

After finding that Prosser didn't have the full series of six antivenin shots he needed, an ambulance rushed him the 30 miles to the Richland hospital.

Anderson spent some time in the hospital, but will make a full recovery. As to the headless rattler, he probably won't. But you never know. Zombies are terribly hard to keep down. We here at Blue Crab Boulevard strongly recommend the use of flamethrowers when dealing with rattlesnakes. They don't move very fast if they're extra crispy.