Pool Pig Pandemonium!

Forget Beach Blanket Bingo, we have a new phenomenon for the new millennium! Pool Pig Pandemonium! It has it all: scantily-clad eye candy (both male and female) scrambling madly about. Drama and tension as a new threat is introduced. Porcine playfulness in a public pool. This is box office gold!

Peaceful holidays were shattered today after a wild boar went berserk and leapt into a packed hotel pool for a swim before being shot dead by police.

Holidaymakers ran screaming after the animal dived into the deep end of the popular Riu Hotel in Torrox near Malaga, Spain.

Armed Civil Guard officers chased it out of the building and along a main road to a nearby beach before shooting it.

One officer was injured in the three-hour pursuit after cutting himself on barbed wire.

Police were called after the wild boar was spotted on Torrox seafront shortly before heading for the hotel.

It is believed to have left its normal retreat in the hills behind the Mediterranean to look for water to cure cuts on its body.

A Civil Guard spokesman said: "Wild boar can be very dangerous when injured."

Of course you realize what this means, though. Poolside porcine playboys are making a play for bikini-clad beauties. This is outrageous! This is criminal! Oh, wait. That's business as usual, isn't it?

Major Surprise

Yesterday the "Who?" candidates for the Democratic presidential nomination, Chris Dodd, Bill Richardson and Joe Biden all pledged not to campaign in rogue states that have moved their primaries up in defiance of party rules. This was widely seen as a nice gesture but pretty well meaningless in the great scheme of things. Since none of the "principled" candidates have huge treasuries at their disposal, it could just as easily have been a cost-saving measure. But in a real surprise today, Obama and Edwards also signed on to the pledge and Hillary! Clinton rapidly jumped on the bandwagon for fear of being left behind.

WASHINGTON - Hillary Rodham Clinton, Barack Obama and John Edwards on Saturday joined three other Democrats who say they will skip states that break party rules by holding early primaries.

Their decision is a major boost to the primacy of four early voting states — Iowa, New Hampshire, Nevada and South Carolina — and a welcome development to the Democratic National Committee.

"We believe Iowa, New Hampshire, Nevada and South Carolina play a unique and special role in the nominating process," Clinton campaign manager Patti Solis Doyle said. "And we believe the DNC's rules and its calendar provide the necessary structure to respect and honor that role."

The DNC has tried to impose discipline on a handful of unruly states determined to vote before Feb. 5 and gain influence in the election cycle.

"Iowa, New Hampshire, Nevada and South Carolina need to be first because in these states ideas count, not just money," Edwards said. "This tried-and-true nominating system is the only way for voters to judge the field based on the quality of the candidate, not the depth of their war chest."

Obama said the DNC's nominating process is "in the best interests of our party and our nation."

Their pledges came a day after rivals Chris Dodd, Bill Richardson and Joe Biden endorsed the plan, which was promoted by Democratic leaders of the four states that have party approval to hold early contests.

Despite how the AP led its story here, Clinton was dead last to this little bit of political theater. But the Republican candidates are now in a corner and had better also follow suit - right now. Otherwise it will be used as a club against them. Believe it. The Dems will puff themselves up and point to their "principled" stand for ideas rather than money. (I suspect this has a lot to do with trying to distract attention from Norman Hsu and his unusual methods of financing Democratic candidates.) "Look! Over there! It's Halley's Comet!"

(Don’t) Let Them Eat Pasta

Organizers are trying to set up a one-day pasta strike in Italy to protest the sharp increase in the cost of the staple food of that nation. It seems that the price of spaghetti has jumped by some 30% recently. Why? Well, manufacturers are blaming a wheat shortage caused by farmers switching production to corn and other crops - to produce biofuels.

On the 13 September, there will be no spaghetti, fettucine, farfalle or rigatoni in Italy, as the country goes on its first-ever pasta strike.

Angry Italians are downing their forks in response to a 30 per cent price rise in the nation's favourite food, along with steep rises in the price of coffee, mozzarella, bread, biscuits and schoolbooks.

A second strike over the increase in the price of a cup of coffee in a cafe, from 70 euro cents (50p) to one euro, has also been threatened.

According to Italy's four largest consumer groups, the average household in the Bel Paese will be stung for an extra £700 this year on their shopping.

"Giving up pasta for the day will be a symbolic gesture," said a spokesman for the consumer groups. "Italians should not buy any pasta that day, and try their best not to eat it at home."

Most Italians eat pasta at least once a day, and consume around 54 kilograms over the course of the year. ……

…….The pasta-makers said the reason for the 30 per cent price rise was a shortage of wheat because farmers were switching to produce crops for the biofuel industry. Currently, a half-kilogram (1.1lb) pack of pasta costs around 70 euro cents (50p) in Italy and 70p to £1.10 in the UK.

The consumer groups behind the national pasta-out say that it is just the manufacturers speculating. Then cheerily note that the price of bread - made from wheat - is also rising but see no connection. Er, ok. That makes sense. Not. I've noted on several occasions that biofuels are causing severe upward pressure on food prices - and will continue to do so. It will get much worse very soon.

National Health Death Service Kills Another War Hero

Well, the British National Health Service, touted as a role model for socialized medicine by the likes of Michael Moore, appears to be trying to do its bit to reduce health care costs in Britain. By killing off the old war veterans one by one.

The family of a distinguished war veteran have criticised the hospital where he was infected by a killer bug.

Major Sam Weller - who survived three years as a prisoner of war - died after catching Clostridium Difficile following an operation on his hip. His relatives said he had been let down by the country he fought for.

Major Weller, 88, had surgery at Gloucestershire Royal Hospital but he developed an infection and was given a course of antibiotics.

Weeks later he died and an inquest was told the medicine had left him more vulnerable to catching the superbug.

Yesterday, his family criticised the hospital treatment he received and standards of hygiene on the wards. His son Martin, 59, a council planning officer, said: "He was a wonderful man who served his country well. He didn't deserve to die like this.

"Gloucestershire Royal Hospital has an appalling record for C. Diff and here is another tragic case. My father died in a lot of pain."

Mr Weller criticised the hospital's record on "infection control" which he said had been visible to him and his family.

He refused to go into details, but said he felt "let down" by those responsible for his father's care.

The major's wife of 50 years, Berthe, added that her husband had considered the ward to be "noisy and grubby".

Dirty hands and dirty sheets spread the killer bacteria. Basic hygiene helps control it. This is not the first war hero killed by the NHS - by a long shot. There were 2,247 people killed in British hospitals by this particular bug in 2005. There were 56,000 people infected with it in the past year alone.

Still think socialized medicine is a great idea?

Collision

The Daily Mail has some unusual - and terrible - pictures from an air show in Poland. Two airplanes collided in midair during the show. Both pilots were killed. Tragic. I've never seen pictures quite this clear of a collision and the aftereffects.

And In Today’s Alligator News

Webster City, Iowa has alligators rampaging through the streets. No, really, they do.

WEBSTER CITY — It was a scene straight out of a comic book Monday night in Webster City — an alligator was running free in the street.

The alligator, only 1 foot long, did not pose a threat to the citizens, but it did draw a crowd. According to Webster City Police Chief Mike McConnell, the alligator is a pet of Chris Louk, 25, of Webster City.

Louk was issued a citation for animal at large and will have a court appearance on Sept. 11.

McConnell said that he believes Louk has taken steps to ensure that the alligator will not get loose again.

A report of an alligator running loose was the second one within a couple of months. Due to the rare occurrence of the incident, Webster City officials were not aware of a new Iowa law regarding exotic animals and it wasn’t until the recent sighting of the alligator that they took appropriate action.

Rare? It's the second one in a couple of months. That's approaching 'frequent'. Meanwhile, in Fort Meyers, Florida, their alligator is slightly less sprightly. In fact, it's dead.

Passersby this morning are reporting a dead alligator lying in a turn lane on Daniels Parkway near Palomino Lane.

Reports of the dead reptile started coming in to the Lee County Sheriff’s Office around 6:30 a.m., officials said.

We should point out that alligators sometimes play possum (although they are rather bad at it, since they lack fur. They seldom fool anyone). We'd be very, very careful. And completing today's reptile trifecta, Orlando, Florida has a different dead alligator mystery. Someone stole the frozen alligator head.

ORLANDO, Fla. — Someone who burglarized an old auto repair shop got a big surprise - a frozen alligator head stuffed in a garbage bag.

The Prange family, which has owned a brake and alignment shop for 87 years, was storing the head for a friend who planned to mount it.

"We hope he jumps when he opens the garbage bag," said Steve Prange, 55.

We probably would. We are assuming that this alligator is not playing possum.

Sometimes Things Are Not What They Seem

The conventional wisdom coming from the inside the beltway type journalists is that Republicans are in trouble because of the wave of retirement announcements and now the resignation of Senator Larry Craig. But things are not always as they appear. Fred Barnes, in fact, is reporting that things are actually opposite what they appear to be. There appears to be a concerted effort by the Republican leadership to clean house well before the 2008 elections and get rid of any hint of corruption - before the party can get blind-sided.

Republicans are so intent on pushing scandal-plagued members of Congress out of office and far from the media spotlight that the entire party–from the White House to congressional leaders to the Republican National Committee to various campaign committees–was instantly united last week in the effort to force Senator Larry Craig of Idaho to resign.

At another time, Republicans might have cut Craig some slack, allowing him to finish his term and not seek reelection. But after suffering crushing losses in last year's midterm election–spurred in part by highly publicized GOP corruption in Congress–Republicans are not in a mood to tolerate another nasty scandal. The common expression among leaders is that they must "clean house."

They were already doing so when the story broke last week of Craig's arrest and subsequent guilty plea for disorderly conduct in an airport men's room notorious as a spot for anonymous gay sex. House Republicans had quietly coaxed Rep. Rick Renzi of Arizona into announcing his retirement next year. And with at least one more forced retirement expected, the corruption issue was being taken care of, belatedly but decisively.

This is actually an interesting strategy and could pay off in the long run. With a sudden major campaign finance scandal rocking the Democrats - from top to bottom - the decisive moves by the Republican leadership could work out very well, indeed.

If the Republicans clean house (even belatedly) but the Democrats circle the wagons over their fundraising scandal, the voters may remember that "culture of corruption" meme with a whole new set of players come election day.

Senator Craig Resigns

Idaho Senator Larry Craig has resigned, as expected.

"I apologize for what I have caused," Craig said.

Craig's resignation completed a stunning downfall that began Monday with the disclosure that he had pleaded guilty to a reduced charge following his arrest during a sex sting in a Minneapolis airport men's room.

Although leading members of his own party had called for him to step down, Craig steadfastly resisted resigning for days, contending that he had done nothing wrong and that his only mistake was pleading guilty to a misdemeanor charge.

Craig was defiant after the arrest and guilty plea were first reported. "I am not gay. I never have been gay," he declared Tuesday in Boise, Idaho, with his wife, Suzanne, at his side. He said he had kept the incident from aides, friends and family and later pleaded guilty "in hopes of making it go away."

Craig, 62, has represented Idaho in Congress for more than a quarter-century and was up for re-election next year. He had not said if he would run for a fourth term in 2008 and was expected to announce his plans this fall.

"It is with sadness and deep regret that I announce it is my intention to resign from the Senate effective Sept. 30," Craig said, with his wife again at his side and Idaho Gov. C.L. "Butch" Otter standing behind him.

I could not possibly care less what Larry Craig's proclivities are or are not. The fact is that a small incident like this is turned into a major scandal if a Republican is involved. The press routinely ignores much worse on the Democratic side. That's why someone like Ted Kennedy still serves even though he - at best - let a woman drown (and it could very well be a lot worse than that) or that Robert Byrd is treated as an elder statesman despite his past in the Ku Klux Klan. Let's not even get started on Bill Clinton.

Them's the facts and Republican lawmakers should by now know that the rules are applied differently to them.  

Snake City!

You know they never roll the streets up 'cause there's always somethin' goin' (Surf City, here we come)
You know they're either out surfin' or they got a party growin' (Surf City, here we come)
Yeah, and there's two swingin' honeys for every guy
And all you gotta do is just wink your eye

  And we're goin' to Surf City, 'cause it's two to one
  You know we're goin' to Surf City, gonna have some fun
  You know we're goin' to Surf City, 'cause it's two to one
  You know we're goin' to Surf City, gonna have some fun, now
  Two girls for every boy
(Jan Berry-Brian Wilson, Surf City)

Substitute 'snake' for 'surf' and that old Jan and Dean song could pretty well describe the village of Choto Pashla in the West Bengal state of India. There are around 3,000 snakes - mostly cobras - and about 6,000 people.

The village of Choto Pashla in West Bengal state has one snake for every two residents, mainly the poisonous monocled cobra, a black reptile with a yellow ring around its neck that can grow to seven feet (two metres) in length.

Such snakes are found everywhere — in rice fields, ditches, muddy ponds and even sometimes sunning themselves by houses — and no one appears to fear them.

"The poison-fanged reptiles represent a way of life in Choto Pashla. People of the neighbouring villages are scared to come here," said Samir Chatterjee, the local school headmaster, who has written a book about the snakes.

"A recent count by the villagers found there are more than 3,000 snakes in this village of 6,000 people."

The Geological Survey of India is studying the village to figure out why the cobras are flourishing there, an official said.

"We wonder why a particular species of snakes is thriving in this village," said the official, asking not to be named. "We are looking into the topography of the village."

Well, let's see: the snakes are worshiped rather than being exterminated and the residents feed the snakes daily, too. I wonder why there are so many of them? That's a real head scratcher. About a dozen villagers die each year from snakebite - which also helps keep the 2 to 1 ratio intact, one presumes. When a snake dies, the village gets together and puts it into an earthen jar and tosses it into the Ganges River. (One presumes the folks living downstream are wise to this trick by now and don't open the jars if they find them bobbing along).

Anyway, with a minor rework of the lyrics, we believe Snake City by the Bengali Boys could be a monster hit. We fully expect a commission if this comes to pass.

A Game With No Winners

The Opinion Journal points out the rank insanity of the game of leapfrog the various states are playing with their presidential primaries. It is becoming a completely unworkable system and will completely eliminate the possibility of a dark horse candidate breaking through. It also sets up a possible scenario where a very mediocre candidate would win the nomination by virtue of being well funded.

The way things are going, the first votes in the 2008 Presidential election may yet be cast in 2007, more than 10 months before the national elections next November. This is not an improvement.

In a little-noticed move this week, Wyoming Republicans moved their party conventions to January 5, beating out Michigan, which just moved its primaries to January 15. State laws in Iowa and New Hampshire require those states, in turn, to leapfrog Michigan and Wyoming, potentially pushing one or both elections into December. So voters in those two states might have to interrupt their holidays to participate in a Presidential primary campaign better held during a much less busy season.

This maneuvering continues a Presidential election process that is changing in ways that make it both longer, yet paradoxically less reflective, than ever. Sixty years ago, Presidential nominees were chosen largely by delegates to conventions held in late summer, between 60 to 90 days before the actual vote. That system gave us FDR, Truman and Ike, to name three better than average Presidents. It also gave us Warren Harding–but then no system is perfect.

In any event, this was deemed too beholden to insiders, so the Progressives lobbied for primaries to open the nominating process to more voters. Yet those primaries were also spread out, from March through the early summer, allowing candidates to adjust to a defeat, raise money between primaries, and even to enter at a late date.

All of that is gone at this point. The winner will likely be decided in a short few week window. There will be no chance of a relatively obscure person making a breakthrough. The "progressive" ideas have virtually ensured that only a well-heeled candidate can possibly win. The complete loss of control by the parties is evident. This is not a good thing for the country. It will not be a good thing for the voters, certainly. The choices will be predetermined by who raises the most money - the exact opposite of what was intended by "opening up" the process. The smoke-filled rooms will simply move further ahead of the preliminary election called a primary. But the outcome will have been predetermined before the first primary vote is cast.

The Goatsuckers Are Coming! Eek!

We have another demon hound from hell! Or a goatsucker. Whatever. Last year it was the Hell Hound of Turner, Maine. Yeah, yeah, sure, we know that turned out to be a dog (despite our best efforts to get a conspiracy theory started). But now we have a Chupacabra, literally translated as "Goatsucker" near Cuero, Texas. Or at least the head of something that is being claimed to be a Chupacabra.

CUERO, Texas - Phylis Canion lived in Africa for four years. She's been a hunter all her life and has the mounted heads of a zebra and other exotic animals in her house to prove it. But the roadkill she found last month outside her ranch was a new one even for her, worth putting in a freezer hidden from curious onlookers: Canion believes she may have the head of the mythical, bloodsucking chupacabra.

"It is one ugly creature," Canion said, holding the head of the mammal, which has big ears, large fanged teeth and grayish-blue, mostly hairless skin.

Canion and some of her neighbors discovered the 40-pound bodies of three of the animals over four days in July outside her ranch in Cuero, 80 miles southeast of San Antonio. Canion said she saved the head of the one she found so she can get to get to the bottom of its ancestry through DNA testing and then mount it for posterity.

She suspects, as have many rural denizens over the years, that a chupacabra may have killed as many as 26 of her chickens in the past couple of years.

"I've seen a lot of nasty stuff. I've never seen anything like this," she said.

It is a bit hard to tell from the low resolution picture that accompanies the AP article what exactly the frozen noggin might be, but it sure as heck looks canine. And blue. Much like the Turner beast was. The story quotes a local veterinarian who is pretty sure its either a bizarre mutt dog or possibly a mutation. He also thinks the "bloodsucking" is nothing really unusual. The animal may simply prefer to lap up blood rather than tear up the chickens. The chupacabra-sicle will undergo genetic testing.

Note that the chupacabra entry in Wikipedia pretty much debunks every claim made recently about the discovery of a chupacabra. Most turn out to be just dogs. The entry does miss that DNA testing in the Turner case, though.