All in all it was just a brick in the wall.
All in all it was all just bricks in the wall."You! Yes, you! Stand still laddy!"
(Roger Waters (Pink Floyd), Another Brick in the Wall, Part 1)
You! With the knitting needles! Just stand still! In probably the most insane bit of bureaucracy run completely amok in Britain since the great mince pie caper, the "Safety Police" have taken away knitting needles from folks waiting in a hospital waiting room. Because those darned things might hurt someone. Or something.
For three years it has been a simple way for hospital visitors to make a difference while they wait.
Patients and relatives – indeed anyone handy with a pair of needles – have been asked to knit a small square to be turned into blankets for local charities.
But that was until the health and safety brigade heard what was going on.
Although no one has so much as nicked a finger as a result of the scheme at Congleton War Memorial Hospital in Cheshire, officials have decided the knitting needles are too sharp to be used safely.
Instead, anyone looking to while away a few minutes must ask permission at the hospital's reception before being handed the supposedly hazardous equipment.
Local people, knitting enthusiasts and campaigners against political correctness joined forces to condemn the unlikely crackdown.
Best of all is the response the Daily Mail got from the local idiots officials who banned the knitting:
Bernie Salisbury, director of nursing and operations at East Cheshire NHS Trust, said: "We believe this sensible and proactive measure will avoid preventable accidents."
Yep. There sure are a lot of tragic knitting accidents every year. Why the death toll is positively staggering. Why, it's almost like a Saturday Night Live skit. Oh, that's right. It is, you idiots. Why don't all of you go run with scissors or something?
Next they will ban the stick and all sources of sticks because those sticks could poke someone’s eye out. Trees are inherently unsafe. Consider how many boys fall every year climbing them. If those NHS types find out about the dangers of trees, there will be no stopping the burning.
Pingback: Maggie's Farm
Well, what do you expect from a country which has switches next to electrical outlets? Found that to be the case in English hotels… you could plug something in, but you had to turn on the switch in order to let the electricity out. Sheesh! It would be even funnier if it weren’t true!
We must be saved from ourselves! Heaven forbid that we would have to take credit/blame for our own actions!
Waitaminnit… how much did that dummy get for spilling hot coffee in her own lap? I rest my case!