Butchering Badly Behaved Bacon

As reported earlier this month, badly behaved bacon has been barging into building in eastern China. Authorities have finally had enough. They have sent in teams of sharpshooters with orders to shoot to kill. The peccant pork will presently be polished off.

Professional hunting teams from the West Lake district of Hangzhou, the capital of the coastal province of Zhejiang, were under orders to shoot to kill the animals, Xinhua news agency said.

A regional official said the campaign began on Monday and that police would also get a piece of the action, as they were under orders to guard road junctions to prevent injuries from the pigs.

Wild hogs appeared in residential quarters of downtown Hangzhou as early as 2002. "Their sightings inside the West Lake area and other downtown areas are getting more common and are no longer treated as news," a resident was quoted as saying.

"West Lake is a most pleasant place to live for wild pigs," Chen Jinxing, with the Longwu Township hunting team, was quoted as saying.

"I think there are at least 1,000 of them inside the West Lake area."

We here at Blue Crab Boulevard predict a new dish will soon appear on restaurant menus in West Lake: Mu Shot Pork.