Blue Crab Boulevard

Let Them Eat Brie

Declareth Queen Nancy. Or if brie is not suitable to their palates, they can have pan-roasted Chesapeake rockfish with sweet potato fennel hash and yellow pepper relish. Or pears with Stilton cheese and watercress. Or perhaps a nice cumin-scented leg of lamb with almond couscous. It's all part of the "greening" of the Capitol that Nancy Pelosi has declared. They may be elected members of Congress, but they eat like kings and queens.

The processed cheese has been replaced with brie. The Jell-O has made way for raspberry kiwi tarts and mini-lemon blueberry trifles. Meatloaf has moved over for mahi mahi and buns have been shunted aside in favor of baguettes.

A revolution is afoot at the deli counters, grills and salad bars of the U.S. House of Representatives.

Newly ascendant Democrats may have hit roadblocks on Iraq and fiscal issues, but they have revamped congressional menus, replacing fatty, pre-made foods with healthier, gourmet alternatives. The once dreary congressional cafeterias now abound with haute cuisine.

The menu transformation is part of Speaker Nancy Pelosi’s “Greening the Capitol” plan to make the House campus more environmentally friendly and socially progressive.

But there can be a downside to delicious. Not everyone is happy with the enhanced offerings. Many congressional employees have complained that as the food quality has increased, so have the prices.

“It’s a big jump from high school cafeteria to fancy-pants gourmet. I just wish my pay improved,” said Caryn Schenewerk, a staffer for Rep. Gabrielle Giffords (D-Ariz.).

A fruit and cheese side dish with two small wedges of brie and cheddar, six grapes, two saltines and one strawberry cost $4.95, for example.

Which, I am quite sure, is well below the market rate for Washington, DC eateries. But worry not, it is for the very best of reasons that they dine as they do - even if there are drawbacks to the biodegradable everything:

Nearly everything in the new cafeterias is biodegradable, from plates to utensils to straws, and that situation has produced a few peculiarities. For example, there are no soup spoons, only teaspoons. The company that manufactures the biodegradable flatware doesn’t make soup spoons yet. And some people have complained that the compostable straws can melt in hot liquids.

Politico headed to the cafeteria at the Rayburn House Office Building to test this scenario. A compostable straw placed in hot coffee did indeed become pliable and droop, although it never disintegrated entirely.

Ventura said customers would have to change their behavior to accommodate the environmentally friendly products.

“We have had a few people observe that [straw] phenomenon and we had to tell them, ‘Sip your coffee like a normal human being,’” Ventura said. “We’re trying to save the planet here.”

Ah yes, dine like an Imperial Roman noble and save the planet. What a concept. But all is not well in the greener, saving the earth mode cafeterias and halls of Nancy's little proto-nanny state. And the rage is completely bipartisan, one should add:

A new rule banning the sale of tobacco products on House of Representatives grounds has got Capitol Hill smokers — we hate to say it — smoking mad.

“The health nannies’ arbitrary ban on a legal and heavily taxed product bodes ill for the future marketing of Mountain Dew and MoonPies,” said Rep. Thaddeus G. McCotter, an infuriated Republican, and smoker, from Michigan.

“This is silly ‘feel good’ crap by a bunch of do-gooders,” barked a high-level Democratic staffer (also a smoker). “We should be worried about the housing crisis, the unemployment rate and the national debt instead of making staffers walk four blocks to buy a pack of smokes.”
We should have seen this coming.

Next up for her majesty: mandatory exercise classes! And more brie!

THIS is your Congressional leadership in action, Democrats. How very proud you must all be of all the things they can accomplish. For the children. Or the whales. Or something. While you worry about where your next dollar is coming from, they have already spent it. On brie.

(H/T to the ever reliable feeblemind for the tip on the first article.)

UPDATE: Incidentally, did you note the unintentionally hilarious photo that accompanied the Politico article about the food? The picture shows the melting straws that are being complained about. But the reporter has two disposable cups stacked together - presumably because the contents are too hot. So how is the freaking straw making a difference in saving the planet?

Others: Protein Wisdom, Moonbattery, Redstate, JunkYardBlog, Lonewacko (Great punchline!), Pirate's Cove,

Politics | Gaius Tuesday, 15 January , 2008

By syn, Tuesday, 15 January , 2008 @ 11:37 am

Yet, independent/moderates are eager for more so they continue voting Dems into office. Ya I know, Republicans corrupt however the corrupt ones are thrown out of office; how many Dems have been thrown out? Murtha, Reid, Clinton, Schumer, Bird, Jeffferson all still eating their pate.

Elections matter, it’s not the corrupt politicians fault they keep getting elected by the people.

GoFred08!
By feeblemind, Tuesday, 15 January , 2008 @ 11:49 am

I have to run, but have a quick question. I wonder if Flaming Penguin is offered on the menu?
By Uncle Pinky, Tuesday, 15 January , 2008 @ 12:59 pm

I wonder if Flaming Penguin is offered on the menu?

Let’s not be silly. Penguins are cute Hollywood darlings, they must never be eaten, even by cute Hollywood polar bears. Yes, I know, wrong poles; but if a polar bear ate a penguin at the zoo, who would the bleeding hearts root for? Silly question really, the polar bears should have made the ethical choice to go vegan.

“Sip your coffee like a normal human being” is actually pretty good advice, except to poorly-paid staffers that have just blown $1200 on getting their teeth bleached. As the hidden costs of using low-quality recyclables go up the food quality will go down but the prices will continue to rise. Soothing Nancy’s conscience requires you to spend more and get less.

Don’t get me started on the smoking idiocy. Just … don’t. Not unless you want to be responsible for my incipient aneurysm.
By Jonn Lilyea, Tuesday, 15 January , 2008 @ 2:45 pm

“Which, I am quite sure, is well below the market rate for Washington, DC eateries…”

Even before our 10% restaurant tax - which, by the way, isn’t charged in the Congressional cafeteria.
By Rich Horton, Tuesday, 15 January , 2008 @ 3:01 pm

Yep, those folks in Congress really identify with “the people” dont they?
By NortonPete, Tuesday, 15 January , 2008 @ 3:12 pm

Someone should change the sign on the spinach quiche to “Soylent Green”.
By feeblemind, Tuesday, 15 January , 2008 @ 3:30 pm

Perhaps Pelosi’s changing of the menu is a blessing in disguise? It was heartening to read that even DEMOCRATIC staffers resent being treated like children. Perhaps after this, congressmen of both parties will think twice before passing nanny legislation? Yeah. Yeah. I know. Wishful thinking. I like Gaius’ idea of mandatory exercise. I think she could improve on that though. Issue every one with a dining card with a data strip like credit cards. Only allow them to purchase their preapproved caloric intake for the meal. As for the smoking…… oh… better not. I don’t want Uncle Pinky to blow a gasket.
By Uncle Pinky, Tuesday, 15 January , 2008 @ 3:41 pm

Thanks for your concern, feeblemind, but I took some BC headache powders and had a lie-down.

As to the smoking; these prissy self-important, rat b*st*rds…..Ack! Ack! … relapse.

We need martinis here, stat.
By Mockin'bird, Tuesday, 15 January , 2008 @ 5:28 pm

I know I’m a bit of a hick, but I don’y know if “Brie” is meat or fish.
I wonder if they have regional American dishes-sqirrel from Kentucky, fried fatback and hominy from SouthCarolina, crawdads from Louisiana, and my favorite, shrimp mammies from Florida. Don’t forget, corn is a vegetable, so sour mash from Tennessee.
By NortonPete, Tuesday, 15 January , 2008 @ 5:34 pm

Your not a hick if you found Bluecrabboulevard, at least that is what I’m sticking to if I get cornered. Brie is a type of soft cheese, its actually not bad warmed. Now as for crawdads or shrimp mammies, set them up I’ve got the Old Milwaukee.
By Scrapiron, Tuesday, 15 January , 2008 @ 11:39 pm

Peeeloshi is just a dumb hack democrat trying to join the world elitest. No matter what she does or how many face lifts she has she will still be a hack and the world elitest will still laugh at her. I wonder if she has her own wine (Ripple and Mad Dog 20-20) on the menu at the price of a good wine.