“I won’t Be In Today….

…I had a friend shoot me." A Washington man had a friend shoot him in the shoulder so he could take some time off from work.

Sheriff's detectives in Franklin County, Wash., say a man had his friend shoot him in the shoulder so he wouldn't have to go to work.

When he first spoke with deputies, Daniel Kuch (KOOCH) told them he'd been the victim of a drive-by shooting while he was jogging Thursday. But detectives told KONA radio that Kuch later acknowledged that he asked his friend to shoot him so he could get some time off work and avoid a drug test.

The friend has been arrested for investigation of reckless endangerment. Kuch is expected to be charged with false reporting.

We have never tried that particular ruse to take a day off. Nor had it ever – remotely – crossed our minds to do so. We prefer the more rational excuses, like: "I was hit by a falling St. Bernard ." Or the ever popular, "There are snakes coming out of the toilet." 

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3 Responses to “I won’t Be In Today….

  1. Lars Walker says:

    Television shows to the contrary, getting shot in the shoulder is not a minor injury. Beyond whatever legal penalties he pays, he’ll suffer for his stupidity the rest of his life. Which is good.

  2. Evil Hr Lady says:

    I have to say, this is an excuse I, nor I dare say any of my colleagues, have ever heard before.

  3. Gaius says:

    Don’t be surprised if some genius is inspired by this story, though.

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