The Turkeys Of Madison Go Postal
Mail carriers in Madison, Wisconsin are the victims of a gang of stalkers. At random intervals, the postal workers are attacked by wild turkeys.
About five to 10 of the birds have been pecking at the postal workers as they make their rounds, and some of the birds have attacked the letter carriers with the sharp spurs on their legs. One of the birds went through the open door of a mail truck and scratched the driver.
Wilhite sought help in the matter from Eric Lobner, regional wildlife program supervisor for the state Department of Natural Resources.
Lobner said the behavior is clearly tied to the breeding season, which started recently and runs through about mid-May.
Color plays an important role in turkey breeding, he said, with the color of the male's head during mating season changes from gaudy blue to white to red. Lobner speculated that perhaps the turkeys are attracted to the red, white and blue postal trucks.
Which, of course, does not explain why this has not happened before, since postal vehicles have been painted in that particular color scheme for a very long time. Regular readers will recognize the obvious criminal tendencies of wild turkeys, who have been known for acts of bad behavior for years. There are the terrible turkeys of terror who have been running amok in Brookline, Massachusetts for years now. They have been stealing lunch money for ages. We suspect that the Turkeys of Madison City (not soon to be a major motion picture starring Clint Eastwood and Meryl Streep) are after more than lunch money. Note the time of year. We think they are after the refund checks.
By Mockinbird, Tuesday, 8 April , 2008 @ 3:14 pm
I think that the postal workers need to start carrying a turkey deterrent- a mixture of equal parts:parsley, sage rosemary…and thyme.
By Mockinbird, Tuesday, 8 April , 2008 @ 3:18 pm
I know for a fact the turkeys are after the refund checks! My first cousin works as senior teller in Madison at Gobbler National Bank of Wisconsin, and the turkeys all want these check cashed.