Pix

Brown Bess demonstration (A .75 caliber musket.) Fort George, Ontario

American Falls and Bridal Veil Falls from The Maid of the Mist, Niagara Falls, Ontario

Under the Horseshoe Falls, Niagara Falls, Ontario

The Whirlpool (MUCH more impressive when in a small boat inside it!) Niagara Falls, Ontario

Traction, Part Two

The Democrats have a real problem. Prior to the holiday recess, they announced how super-confident they were that they had the Republicans in a political corner with their enlightened energy policies. Except they have withdrawn all their big bills from consideration - because the people, bless their hearts - want DOMESTIC solutions that don't count on windy promises.

House Democrats are in a bind on the focal point of their energy plan.

Worried that a floor vote on any energy-related measure would trigger a Republican-forced vote on domestic drilling, the leadership has scrubbed the floor schedule of the energy legislation that it vowed to tackle after the Fourth of July recess.

Just before leaving for their districts, a number of House Democrats called a press conference to declare victory on a number of energy bills — including overwhelming passage of a bill to rein in excessive oil market speculation.

Democrats declared victory on a bill they failed to pass on the suspension calendar — their “use it or lose it bill” to force energy companies to either start drilling on their federally leased land or give it back — saying they had put 176 Republicans on record as siding with the oil companies over consumers.

And they vowed that the bill, the centerpiece of their energy message, would be back.

“We’ve taken some bold steps this week, and we’re going to build on that [after recess] with the bills we take up,” Democratic Caucus Vice Chairman John Larson (Conn.) said at the press conference.

But, as of Monday afternoon, neither “use it or lose it” nor any other energy measure had been scheduled for floor action this week.

Democrats said they were simply taking a different approach to passing their top energy-related priorities.

What is their super-whamadyne strategy? The money quote:

“Right now, our strategy on gas prices is ‘Drive small cars and wait for the wind,’ ” said a Democratic aide.

Larger families - which exist in large numbers - the Democratic strategy leaves out. Those who actually understand the realities of power generation are shaking their heads - trust me on this. Regardless of what your political beliefs are, wind power is available about 30% of the time. Period. Most of the time the wind is either too weak or too strong to produce power.

Politics by wishful thinking is not going to solve the energy problem. Waiting for windy promises is downright stupid. The Democrats are terrified of having to vote an up-or-down "drill now" bill.

Because they would lose.

Are We, As A People, Really This Dumb?

I really hate the "cry baby" portion of America…I really do.  Case in point: 'Zero' chance lottery tickets stun some players

When Scott Hoover bought a $5 scratch-off ticket in Virginia called "Beginner's Luck" last summer, he carefully studied the odds. Even though he figured his chances of winning were a long shot, he felt the odds were reasonable.

Hoover, a business professor at Washington and Lee University in Virginia, wasn't surprised when his tickets didn't bring him the $75,000 grand prize, but he was shocked to learn the top prize had been awarded before he bought the ticket.

"I felt duped into buying these things," Hoover said.

He discovered the Virginia State Lottery was continuing to sell tickets for games in which the top prizes were no longer available. Public records showed that someone had already won the top prize one month before Hoover played. He is now suing the state of Virginia for breach of contract.

The mind boggles. You really have to be an academic to not understand the concept of "scratch off" lottery games.  All you have to do is think about it for 10 seconds to realize even before the top prize has been awarded you can buy tickets that have "no chance."  For example, you may never visit the town the tickets is randomly shipped to, or you may never visit the particular store selling the top prize.  Therefore, all of the tickets you buy have "no chance" to win the top prize.

Somebody with a PhD in Business needs this explained to them?  Really?  (There goes Washington & Lee off the list of schools I'd willingly send my children.)

Of course I'd feel better if the story also contained a regular person style "voice of sanity" perspective.  No such luck.

In New Jersey, tickets for the "$1,000,000 Explosion" scratch-off game were still on sale last week, even though the million-dollar grand prize was already awarded.

Lottery ticket buyers outside a New Jersey convenience store were stunned to hear the news.

"Oh really? I didn't know that," one shopper told CNN. Another added, "That's just not right."

I forget….how many generations of imbeciles was enough?

Vacation

I've posted some of the travel adventures we've been having. Today we head for Upstate New York to visit family. I'll try and post a few more things from there if I can. I am currently sitting in a hotel lobby in Niagara Falls, Ontario using the free WiFi they advertise. Unfortunately, the free WiFi is only available here, not in my room. Hence the bulk posting rather than a few retail ones.

Wild Ride

On the tour we took of Niagara Falls, one of the stops was at an overlook where you could see the Niagara Whirlpool. While we were there, a jet boat entered the whirlpool – intentionally, mind you. The boats take people for a ride through this whirlpool.

After we finished our tour, we had about an hour to relax. Then we had to drive back up to Niagara on the Lake for a jet boat tour of the lower Niagara. My wife had booked the tour after seeing the jet boat in the whirlpool.

We were warned that we needed a change of clothes – we would get wet on the ride. I chose, wisely, to wear a bathing suit. So did everyone except my youngest son (more on that later). We arrived about an hour before the boat was to leave and had to fill out waivers that promised we wouldn’t sue the boat operators if they happened to kill us. This did not give me a warm, fuzzy feeling about the ride.

After a brief safety lecture, the herd of tourists was prodded down to the boat landing. They gave us life jackets and swim shoes, allowing us to leave our own shoes back at the dock, should we return to claim them. If we didn’t, I’m sure that there was a clause in the waiver form giving the operators the shoes. Only a very few people availed themselves of the offer of a heavy, yellow raincoat since the perky tour guide had warned that it really wouldn’t help.

Off we went, traveling south into the Niagara river. At first, it was just a leisurely cruise in a not very comfortable boat. We were packed in rows on hard plastic seats with a chromed handrail in front of us. The perky tour guide pointed out a few sights then explained that we were in a “no wake” zone. Hence the slow speed. Then she explained how the jet boat could be made to spin in a 360 degree circle. We were clear of the no wake zone now, so the captain proceeded to demonstrate.

The engines revved, the boat accelerated and began turning to the left, then suddenly lurched hard to the right and spun around in its own length. Each lunge was accompanied by large sheets of water being thrown into the boat, thoroughly drenching the rows of tourists. This, it turns out, was only the beginning.

As we approached the Devil’s Hole rapids, the perky tour guide explained that she hated cold water and left for the back of the boat. We were instructed to put and sunglasses or hats into the net bag suspended from the chrome hand rails in front of us. This turned out to be good advice.

The captain then demonstrated what the guide called the “Pop, Drop and Slide”, As we headed into the rapids, the hull of the boat was slapped by a wave, making a popping sound. Then the boat dropped about 12 feet into a trough, leaving many tourist stomachs behind, then the boat began climbing out of the trough, engines screaming and you could feel the boat slide to the left as it climbed.

All of this part was relatively dry. But the captain spun the boat and went back into the rapids from the other side. This time, there was only a drop then solid sheets of water roared over the boat and onto the cargo of tourists. And I mean sheets of water. When we came out of rapids again, we were ankle deep in water.

I wanted to point out that we appeared to be sinking, but the engines were howling now as we turned back to do another pop, drop and slide. The captain appeared to  be unhappy with our degree of wetness and aimed to correct that deficiency. He spun the boat again and drove back into the rapids, this time finding the perfect wave – from his standpoint.

We lurched downward into a massive trough and the captain proceeded to drive the boat under the rapids. If we had been hit with sheets of water on the previous run, this time we got the sheets and the blankets. Water pounded down onto our heads and we came back out of the rapids with water nearly up to the seats. Then the captain spun the boat and headed back into the rapids. This time he took us further south and we entered the whirlpool itself.

The captain did not do any tourist-drenching in this area, however. Here the fury of the Niagara was such that any attempt would have been fatal. So the crew just told us about how awful or fate would be if they even tried anything funny up there. This isn’t quite as much fun as the controlled drowning of tourists, but it amused the crew.

Then we headed back to the rapids. The captain made three more passes into the rapids, each one getting the occupants of the boat even wetter – if that is possible. But on the very last of the three, the captain had a treat for us. He had everyone slide over and crowd to the right of the boat. Then he kicked up the engines and drove straight back into the boiling rapids.

This time, we got the sheets, the blankets, the down comforter and several nightstands. Those who managed to keep their eyes open got a lovely view of the Niagara River from the underside. It was not a good idea to gasp in wonder. I did make the acquaintance of several trout, however. Well, ok, I didn’t really. I don’t think the trout are crazy enough to go up there. They just swim around downriver and watch the stupid tourists.

Then it was a quick trip back to the dock. Our Niagara River adventure was over.

I want to go again.

Touring

Day two dawned clear and warm. I was the only one of the family to see that portion of the day. The rest of the tribe slept in a bit. When I started waking them, there was a lot of complaining. But eventually the tribe assembled and trooped off for breakfast. We had to be ready for the tour we had scheduled.

We were the last to be picked up, the bus was almost full. Several of the people who had boarded before us were in large family groups. When we tried to all sit, we came up one seat short. The driver had to go through his list and found that one family group had booked four kids as “lap” rather than buying the oldest kid a seat. They would have gotten away with it on a less full bus. They had an uncomfortable tour with a 70 pound “toddler” sitting on their laps.

The highlight of the tour was the trip on the Maid of the Mist. It is an awe-inspiring trip. The sheer power of 50% of the falls is amazing. Yes, only 50%. The rest is diverted to the power plants. Those awe-inspiring falls are only half the volume they were originally. They must have been truly frightening before they were diverted. (Actually, at night they are only 25%. Another 25% of the water is sent through the tunnels instead of over the falls at night.)

I have not checked these figures but am writing this based on tour signs posted in various places. The signs stated that 1/5 of the earth’s supply of fresh water flowed over Niagara Falls. The total electrical output of the Niagara River power plants is under 5,000 megawatts. Assuming the output is averaged; diverting the entire Niagara into the plants would generate something like 10,000 megawatts.

That should give even non-engineering types a rough idea of how much energy is required to create electricity.

Road Trip

A long, long drive and we are finally in Canada. The trip has been smooth, despite its length and the mind-numbing monotony of long periods of night driving on the interstates. I tried to stop every two hours or so, just to let this clown car of seven people crammed into a putatively seven-passenger vehicle discharge its disgruntled and cramped occupants. A few moments of shaking out cramps or walking off stiffness and off we went, back to the darkened road.

There were no problems this trip. No breakdowns, no accidents, no suicidal deer trying their luck on the sheet metal; no, this has been smooth sailing. That isn’t strictly true, actually. My wife’s perennial road trip curse has raised its head. She came down with a case of conjunctivitis on the morning we were to leave. This is not bad by previous standards. She didn’t throw her back out, requiring me to fly out to rescue her. (That time  ended up with me needing rescue. That’s another story, though.)

When we got here, it was far, far too early to check into the hotel in Niagara Falls, so I decided we should try to find Niagara on the Lake and Fort George. This would not normally be an especially difficult task; the Niagara region is not really all that big. However, when seven groggy, sleep deprived people – or rather six groggy, sleep deprived begin to give helpful advice at odds with the navigator’s judgment, it can get a bit more difficult.

We did finally track down the Fort, which I am sure was doing its best to hide from us. Had our positions been reversed, I would have tried to avoid contact with a clown car full of grumpy, stiff, sleep-deprived people. When we pulled into the parking area, we encountered The Confused Scot.

The Confused Scot was desperately trying to feed $6 (Canadian) into a device that spits out a ticket good for parking at the fort. He was, and I am not making this up, using nickels. This can be a tedious thing to watch, or even to remember having watched. Especially since said machine would also take plastic. This is what I used when The Confused Scot finally won his ticket in his bizarre reverse slot machine game and let me get to the machine. We never saw The Confused Scot again – a good thing, since my hands had begun itching to throttle him after the first dollar went in. I do not even want to know why he had six dollars worth of nickels with him (although I suspect he won them in a slot machine and was confused about the process of cashing out.)

The fort is a reconstructed one, built in the late 1930s. The only original part is the old powder magazine. But they have reenactors dressed in the period costumes to tell you about the fort and its history. (The original fort was flattened by American artillery during the War of 1812. British forces retook the fort a short while later.)

After wandering about the fort for a couple of hours, watching a demonstration of the “Brown Bess” musket and a fife and drum corps performance and examining the various displays in the buildings, we trudged back to the car, more awake and alert than we had been when we arrived. The rejuvenated occupants of the clown car all agreed that their earlier questioning of the navigator’s sanity had been premature. Then I unlocked the car and let them into the car.

We followed the Niagara Turnpike down to Niagara Falls after grabbing a surprisingly good quick lunch in Niagara on the Lake. The turnpike is a rather narrow, twisting, two-lane road with a nice wide bike path next to it. So naturally, the first thing we encountered was a guy on a bike wanting to share the meager pavement with the horde of cars rather than use the nice, paved blacktop bike path – which actually looked wider than the turnpike. I decided against adding a new hood ornament to the rental van – I cannot guarantee other drivers were so inclined.

We arrived at our hotel and found that one of the two rooms was ready. The other one took about another hour to get ready. By now, the toll of the trip was again showing on the occupants of the clown car. So, I sent the worst looking of the bunch (my youngest boy) to bed, which determined the rest of the sleeping arrangements. My wife, daughter and I waited for the unready room to be readied. By the end of that hour, we were looking an awful lot like extras in a zombie movie.

We finally got into the room and collapsed for a few hours of sleep. When I rousted the brood, they emerged looking less like zombie extras. More like apocalypse survivor movie extras. It was an improvement. We wandered down Clifton Hill to make the obligatory viewing of the falls – after doing the obligatory dodging of the traffic to get there. Crosswalks are a real rarity for some reason.  After some picture taking, we waded through the sea of humanity (there were a LOT of people) back toward the hill in search of a restaurant. We had coupons for a fairly decent discount at a fairly nice restaurant, so the kids announced that they wanted to eat at the Hard Rock Café. Sans said discount.

After we ate, I sent the kids off in various directions while my wife and I went in search of a pharmacy. We were able to get an eyewash kit that helped her eye when we got back to the room. We still needed to get her some antibiotic ointment, but this at least relieved the discomfort. None of us stayed up late, we were all back in our rooms by around 10pm. We needed the sleep.