I Will Try Not To Sing On A Kia

We are being bombarded with “news” about the 40th anniversary of a celebration of dope by dopes. I’m referring, of course, to Woodstock. For some reason, some people think that this concert, held in a muddy field, was a watershed moment in American history. I never quite got that line of reasoning. I did not go to Woodstock and I honestly think I didn’t miss anything. Except exposure to bad drugs and various social diseases.

Sound a bit jaundiced? You betcha. There are others who take a rather dim view of the celebration of self-absorption as well. Jules Crittenden for one. Don Surber for another. And Dan Riehl.

But on a cheerful note, there is a translation out there of Joe Cocker’s apparently pharmaceutically-enhanced performance at the Bethel Festival (for some reason, they called it Woodstock, even though it was held some 43 miles away in Bethel. Go figure.) Here’s the translation, for the clear-headed. (WARNING: Do not have a sip of coffee in your mouth while viewing. We here at Blue Crab Boulevard are in no way responsible for any liquids spewed on your computer equipment.)

PS – Any annoyed “child of God” who might be offended by this post: Get over yourself.

UPDATE: Thaks for the link back, Jules. Visitors, please do click through for the Cocker translation. It really is very, very funny.

UPDATE: Thanks, Fausta.

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7 Responses to I Will Try Not To Sing On A Kia

  1. Pingback: Jules Crittenden » Woodstock, Celebrating 40 Years Of …

  2. Steve Burri says:

    Parkinson’s does terrible things to a man.

    It sounded like an accurate translation.

  3. muffler says:

    Now we have heard all the cliches and standard anti-everything. The only ones who can’t get over themselves are the ones who seem to have to keep saying how “bad” the people, the idea, the mud and the drugs were at woodstock.

    Woodstock was an example of 400,000 people getting together and experiencing 3 days of their lives. It hurt no one and provided a time capsule of the era. I find it interesting that regardless of your age today you will get the same responses from people based on personalities and other factors.

    The mud was one day and no different then if you were camping and it rained. The pot was what it was. It’s not like the kids were raiding homes in the Bethel area and terrorizing people.

    To everyone who hates the concept of kids getting together (some who served in Vietnam and some on their way) to listen to music and defy their parents – get over it. You don’t hate woodstock… you hate what it represented and still represents. You always will.

  4. Pingback: Fausta’s Blog » Blog Archive » Let me rain on your Woodstock parade

  5. Gaius says:

    muffler, that PS applied to you, I suspect.

    It was a concert. Great. Glad you recognize that. But that is all it was, a concert. A big money-making opportunity for the promoters, with a little bit for the performers.

  6. Michael Croy says:

    muffler thinks this was a big deal. fair enough. I wasn’t at Woodstock, but I did attend a similar type of event at Steven’s Point Wisconsin. 3 days of music, lots of dope, Hell’s Angels screwing with people a la Altamont. The sound system ran about 20 hours a day. After about 48 hours I managed to fall asleep and some joker tipped over a soda bottle and fired a bottle rocket into my sleeping bag. It burned the flesh off my colarbone, which was already sunburned and was subsequently exposed to 90 degree sun directly on the burn as my tank top was the only shirt I had and there was no first aid readily available. Just watch the movie of Woodstock and see how “heavy” it was. People walking around without clothing (that’s a throwback of approx 3000 years easy), Arlo Guthrie announcing to the multitudes how he was “rapping to the Fuzz…dig it…far out..etc” I was right in there with them all and I cringe when I watch the footage. Hope I’ve learned something in the interim.

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