Those people, well, they tend(ed) to die right at the instant their victims died.

No, the democrats are like those nut-jobs you see on the 6:00 news. They go into someplace populated (crowded), start shooting and killing everyone then shoot themselves.

However, come November, I am hoping for a mass “suicide by voter” for these criminals before they can finish the job of killing us and the Republic.

About 50 percent more Democrats than Republicans say they have spoken to the dead.

It is there not surprising that the dead vote overwhelmingly for Democrats over Republicans. “It’s ok for them to have the vote,” thinks the typical Republican bigot, “But I wouldn’t want my sister to marry one or live in the same neighborhood with one. Let them stick to the cemeteries with their own kind.”

I await the day when the state-run media, which has offered such sage advice on how the GOP can recover, starts pointing out that the Religious Right’s ironclad control over the party are the result of deeply ingrained corporeal bigotry, and that Republicans should cast off its prejudiced past and listen to the concerns of the dead (such as the pressing need to legalize dead marriage, affirmative action for the deceased, and a ban on offensive flags and anti-dead symbols like the Jolly Rodger and Halloween costumes).

Perhaps one day, if they follow the state-run media’s advice, the dead will flock to the polls in support of the GOP just like they support Democrats in Chicago.