Category Archives: Animals

ObamaCare’s First Victim

Peace, one of the turkeys pardoned last Thanksgiving by Barack Obama has been euthanized: Peace, one of two turkeys pardoned by President Obama last year, was euthanized Monday, according to an official who insisted the timing of the death – … Continue reading

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Hey, Pilgrim

The turkeys of terror are back in the news in Brookline, MA: “They were attacking the vehicle,” Karen Halvorson said outside her home in the Aspinwall Hill neighborhood. After getting in her truck, a neighbor came and ran the birds … Continue reading

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Obambi Loses Bambi

Oh deer, even the deer are against him: Priem said he even called a city hotline to document the incident in case a more insidious offender was to blame. He couldn’t believe his eyes when his wife showed him the … Continue reading

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About That Band

Why isn’t there a band named the Rabid Beavers?  For Heaven’s sake, there should be. Yet another rabid beaver attack story in the news. One thing in the story is demonstrably false: A doctor confirmed the beaver had rabies a … Continue reading

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We Have a Plan!

Officials in Cape Cod are getting together to plan to begin formulating a plan to protect tourists from great white sharks. Isn’t this exciting? Several Massachusetts towns are taking steps to beef up their protocol to inform lifeguards and protect … Continue reading

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Bear Market

Well, one would have to begin to believe that one is being targeted. Following their first bear invasion that Friday, the Knowles family locked the windows and doors and left home for a dinner gathering. They returned a few hours … Continue reading

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Squirrel!!!

For once it’s not another item in Obama’s campaign strategy. It’s real squirrels.  Real squirrels trying to kill Olympic beach volleyball competitors. The rodents have been burying beechnuts and acorns on six sandy practice courts at London’s St James’s Park. … Continue reading

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Pandemonium

As I reported earlier, authorities in Utah wanted to talk to a guy spotted in a goat suit. And who wouldn’t? Well, we know know who the goat boy is! Phil Douglass of the Utah Division of Wildlife Resources said … Continue reading

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May I Take Your Hat and Goat, Sir?

Well of course they do: Utah wildlife officials want to talk to a man spotted in the mountains wearing a goat suit amid a herd of real wild goats. My first thought on reading this was, “What the heck is … Continue reading

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Criminal Shovels

Good Lord. Canada, what the heck are you doing? Tweet

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Rabid Rodent Rampage

The attack of the rabid beavers. In Philadelphia, for heaven’s sake. Obviously, I’ve been failing to keep up with the Animal Uprising™. (Side question: Why is there not a band called the Rabid Beavers? There ought to be.) Tweet

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Boom, Boom, Black Sheep

Who’s bright idea was it to feed TNT to sheep? In 2004, Craig discovered that the bacteria in a sheep’s stomach that help digest cellulose can also rapidly convert TNT into a harmless compound. In recent experiments, he and researchers … Continue reading

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Up Periscopes

The picture says it all. The Animal Uprising™ has U-Boats. Tweet

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What Mystery?

Thousands of dead birds in Arkansas. Yet another sinister development in the Animal Uprising™? No, not this time. Having spent a month in Arkansas one weekend, I can report with certainty the cause of death: They suddenly realized where they … Continue reading

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Bear Left

With the car: Ralph and Ben Story of Larkspur, Colo., have the story of the day. It involves an unlocked car, a peanut butter sandwich, a hungry black bear and a middle-of-the-night joy ride at 6,669 feet above sea level … Continue reading

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