Category Archives: Humor

Sucks To Be Him

Posted on March 25, 2009 by Gaius

We here at Blue Crab Boulevard diligently try to follow up on the urgent news we have previously reported. We can now report the outcome of a story we first reported about last year. We now know the penalty for … Continue reading →

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Phallatial Estate

Posted on March 24, 2009 by Gaius

We have all heard of palatial estates. This is the first phallatial estate we here at Blue Crab Boulevard have heard of. Rory McInnes, 18, climbed on to the flat roof of his parents’ home and daubed the symbol using … Continue reading →

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Too Late

Posted on March 23, 2009 by Gaius

A Japanese astronaut is test flying, so to speak, some new, “stink-free” underwear: Teen-age boys, are you tired of embarrassing questions about when you last changed underwear? Japan’s space scientists may have just the answer — a line of odour-free … Continue reading →

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Holy Hand Grenade!

Posted on March 19, 2009 by Gaius

Of Antioch, that is. In Monty Python and the Holy Grail, the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch was used to kill “the  most foul, cruel, and bad-tempered rodent you ever set eyes on.” Nowadays, it’s just used to kill business. … Continue reading →

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Great News!

Posted on March 9, 2009 by Gaius

It has taken a lot of years, many career changes and a seemingly unlimited wardrobe budget. But she has finally reached that holy grail! Yes, she can finally get her membership card! Barbie can officially join AARP. She is 50 … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor | 3 Comments

If At First You Don’t Succeed…..

Posted on February 21, 2009 by Gaius

Try, try again. But after failing 775 times, perhaps it is time to rethink your plans. A South Korean woman has failed a driver’s license test 775 times. But is still trying, despite spending close to $7,000 in fees in … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, World news | 1 Comment

Odd Odds & Ends

Posted on January 26, 2009 by Rich Horton

Just a couple links. See what made the Right Wing Prof exclaim: “…free-range chickens are penis-waving, serial-raping, patriarchal psychopaths!” And from the “insert your own joke here” file: Nasty odor plagues St. Louis area The money quote: “”I don’t want … Continue reading →

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Hi Yo Silver! Get Away!

Posted on January 23, 2009 by Gaius

Return with us now to those thrilling days of yesteryear when horses did not get venereal diseases! The California Department of Food and Agriculture says veterinarians have 14 horses in quarantine as they work with federal officials to control a … Continue reading →

Posted in Animals, Humor | 7 Comments

I’d Like To Report A BB&E

Posted on January 12, 2009 by Gaius

That’s a Bullwinkle Breaking & Entering. We’ve reported previously on the sad ruin of Bullwinkle’s life after the show ended. The drinking, the assaults on French tourists and so much more. But now, Bullwinkle has well and truly turned to … Continue reading →

Posted in Animals, Humor, Video | 1 Comment

Little Green Men Bearing Fudge Ripple

Posted on January 9, 2009 by Gaius

Or little men in green coveralls. We report, you decide. The UFO “Truthers” were all het up about the mysterious destruction of a British wind turbine. There appears to be a much more mundane explanation. The UFO allegedly responsible for … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, Space, World news | 1 Comment

Take Another Little Piece Of My Kidney Now, Baby

Posted on January 8, 2009 by Gaius

Janis Joplin and Big Brother and the Holding Company were ahead of their time, if a little off in their anatomy. A New York surgeon wants custody of the kidney he donated to his estranged wife in 2001 – or … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor | 6 Comments

The Moon And Ski Pants

Posted on January 6, 2009 by Gaius

Vail, Colorado saw an early moon rise last Friday. A man managed to fall out of his ski lift chair, but luckily did not fall to the slopes below. Instead, one of his skis and his ski pants snagged and … Continue reading →

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New Year Resolution

Posted on December 31, 2008 by Gaius

This year I’ve decided to make a resolution. I plan on procrastinating more. I’ll start tomorrow. Tweet

Posted in Humor | 1 Comment

Two Scenarios

Posted on December 17, 2008 by Gaius

Scenario one: Some archaeologists open a tomb they believed was sealed some 400 years ago and find a 100 year old watch-ring inside. Conclusion: the archaeologists were wrong and the tomb was opened 100 years ago. Scenario two. Archaeologists open … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor | 3 Comments

The Institute Of Really Good Times?

Posted on December 12, 2008 by Gaius

Oh, this is just plain funny. A respected German research institute, seeking to illustrate a special report on China with Chinese characters, mistakenly ran an ad for a Chinese brothel on its cover page. “The idea was to publish an … Continue reading →

Posted in Humor, World news | 1 Comment